When would you tell a new girlfriend that you carry?

Just exactly how does a woman you are dating find a post of yours on FL?
What would posses her to be looking around here if she is anti gun?
Not questioning your veracity, it just sounds like she had trust issues to be digging around deep enough to find that.
A good woman to lose.
 
When....before she feels it and asks what it is all freaked out in a public place.

How...subtle questions about how she feels about guns and/or hunting.

Last time I was single I only had to deal with this situation once. When I brought up guns and hunting on the first date, she said she had her own rifle. Her dad started her shooting. The relationship didn't go anywhere for other reasons. Guns and hunting are important enough to me that it comes up early and if she is anti gun I want nothing to do with her. It is far better to end it after 1 date and move on than to have weeks invested and have a broken heart over it.
 
"Is that a gun in your pocket or are you just glad to see me?"

-Mary Jane "Mae" West in the film "Sextette."

But seriously, I guess having a woman discover your carry piece in a moment of playfulness could be embarrassing for both of you. It's been so long since I dated (having been with the same woman for 30 years come the 13th of this month) I'm not sure how I would handle this situation. Maybe somewhere between "Nice to meet you" and "Ooh, baby, ah" you might casually mention that you carry a defensive handgun.
 
I can't imagine a first date in which our hobbies and interests wouldn't come up. Mentioning that I'm into shooting should segue into the rest.

That is, unless I do the whole dating thing wrong.
 
When i told her the first date would be hunting moose in Alaska so wear warm clothing
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That's a different subject, someone could be happy with you carrying a firearm. But not happy that you are killing wildlife. I would bring the subject up and see what the response was. Its not like you are telling them you are an alcoholic or similar.
 
Why purposely "bring it up" at all? I would let natural discovery take place. When you remove your firearm from your waste band, or it is exposed during movement, or she asks what you are doing Saturday and you say you have an IDPA match. Let it play out naturally, don't force the issue any more than you would a conversation about politics or philosophy. If she freaks out, freak out with her so she can see people are different and have different points of view.
This ain't rocket surgery, its life.
 
I have been married now for 10+ years and on the 3rd date we went to my house to have her meet my Australian Sheppard (She was a cat person having 6 at the time).
Made us some drinks, picked up some Frisbees and went out on the patio with my Aussy. To get there we had to walk through the 4 season room which just happens to be my reloading aria with a bench.
Didn’t have much out just the two presses and the scales and case boxes.
Started playing with the dog when she asked me what was on the bench.
Explained that I am a gun enthusiast not a hunter. And that was where I reload.
She then relaxed. In her own words “That’s good, for a moment there I thought you were a drug pusher.” One of the scales is a balance scale that I bought off a pharmacist that had a business next door to the gun shop I worked at and very good quality.
On our 7th or 8th date we went out shooting. Nothing but a Ruger MK11 and an AR. She liked the Rugger and shot a good number of rounds through it. Then I asked her if she wanted to shoot the AR and got a resounding no. “But you go ahead.”
Had the target at 25 yards and put 10 rounds down range. Then got up figuring that best not to overdo it on the first time.
She then asked to shoot it.
100 + rounds later and she was hooked, lock stock and barrel.
12 years later, she doesn’t go shooting that often, does have her own AR and carries a 66.
Big suggestion, tell her quickly and don’t push it. You might not be as lucky as I was. In this case we both gave up a little, she got into shooting,,,, I had her and 6 cats come into my life. And if you take her shooting let HER shoot, don’t be a twit by making her watch how “GOOD” you are with all the rounds you put down range.
Fair exchange.
By the way,,,,, GOOD question
 
Why would you not tell her right away if you wish for the relationship to continue. If you carrying a firearm is so disturbing/disgusting to her as to break off a first date, why would it change after the fifth? With one night stands, you don't even need to tell them your real name.


Just sayin'.
 
I can't imagine a first date in which our hobbies and interests wouldn't come up. Mentioning that I'm into shooting should segue into the rest.
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Saying that you're into shooting and saying that you carry are certainly related but on two different levels of the "need-to-know" scale, IMO.

Some people know that I go shooting. As far as their concerned that is a hobby that I do at a range for a bit of fun and competitions now and then.

If I were to tell such people that I am wearing a handgun concealed at that very moment, I bet it would be met with a different response.
 
When would you tell a new girlfriend that you carry?
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I can't imagine a first date in which our hobbies and interests wouldn't come up. Mentioning that I'm into shooting should segue into the rest.
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I can't imagine calling someone on a first date my "girlfriend". That usually comes after I've found we are compatible at some level, either by dating or knowing her as a friend for a while. By the time she becomes my "girlfriend" I should know how she feels about firearms and CWC.
 
I have been married for 32 years, so the dating scene has changed a bit, but my thoughts are along the same lines as Tom Servo. There is bound to be a conversation about hobbies, interests, how you spend your spare time. Slip shooting in with a couple of others and see how the conversation goes. I don't think I would start out with the concealed carry aspect, but it would be less of a surprise later if guns have come up a time or two.
 
Just exactly how does a woman you are dating find a post of yours on FL?
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It's amazing what one can sometimes find by searching a screen name or a real name

Try the OP's name and the first hit is a thread on this site, followed by a long list of other gun-centric sites

It's hard to hide on the internet without planning

Best pocket holster for Kahr P380? - The Firing Line …
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Last updated: Feb 22, 2011 · 18 posts · First post: Feb 19, 2011
Best pocket holster for Kahr P380? ... Mokumbear. Senior Member . Join Date: October 8, 2005. Posts: 660 Huh? Why "delete"? February 19, 2011, 10:47 PM
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Don't offer too much too soon, it will make you look crazy. You can just bring it up. Tell her you are going to the gun range with a friend and ask her if she wants to tag along. Rest assured the subject of hobbies (firearms) will come sooner or later and based on her response you'll have a choice to make, then again she may make it for you. Dating is about getting to know each other and gives both partie an opportunity to identify any deal breaker thus avoiding a disaster.
 
Boy, things have changed since I was dating, way back in the last century. I find it hard to imagine anything beyond a casual date that would not lead to discovery of even a moderate size chunk of iron. An NAA .22 might get by, but a .44 Magnum would be obvious after even a friendly hug, let alone a "serious" date. Maybe the young folks are Puritans or something!

As for anti-gunners, I have never known a real anti to change. She will never quit trying to convert you and the relationship would be a constant battle. Further, with each shooting "incident" antis become more rabid, even to the extent of bringing false criminal charges to "punish" the gun owner for not conforming to the "proper" ideas.

Jim
 
First off, assume she is neutral in the absence of other indicators, like spontaneous comments, political bumper stickers, what magazines are on her coffee table, what radio stations she likes, etc. A lot of people are simply inexperienced and regardless of what they've heard, a girl who likes you can be more open to new ideas. The worst threat in such cases is usually a busybody anti-gun friend in the advice pool.

If things are going well, you should be getting to know each other and talking about life, interests, activities, etc. Casually mention that you are going to the range with a few friends or something. Mention it like it is the most normal thing in the world and don't belabor the point. Remember that a big part of making it tense or weird is up to you. Some women are very good at picking up non-verbal communication, even if you don't know you're communicating it!

See if she bites. If she asks questions, that's a good thing. Dip your toe in the water and see how it feels. Ask if she'd like to come before you ask if she's ever shot a gun before. She'll probably tell you anyway, but that's a question you can ask before you hand her something smooth, easy, and fun to shoot. If she is a first-timer and you are in a place to do it, water jugs make a nice reactive target that can be psychology more rewarding (and less daunting) than a piece of paper.
 
Thank you...

Wow!

So much good advice I don't know where to begin!

See, here is my main concern...
Lots of dates occur at night in entertainment areas where common sense dictates that it would be a good idea to carry just in case.

There have even been cases where women met online have set up guys to be robbed by an accomplice and have even been shot at in my County!

Now, I can carry without printing but I worry if a hug (on a G rated note)
would reveal the feel of steel. I wouldn't want to frighten the poor girl!

I'm just torn between the desire to "not reveal all your crazy on a 1st date" as a female friend used to say and not causing my date to, unnecessarily,
majorly panic! :eek:
 
Carry the gun, controll the hugging event. If there's that much risk in dating in your town CARRY THE GUN, or don't date.
 
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