Having been in a couple spots that I could have died, here's what I get out of it: I am capable of targeting and killing. I don't like it much with animals, and often have regrets.
With people, it's the prolonged legal battle, and, having to justify myself to God that really makes me careful about such situations.
I'm often faced with situations where others might strike out in anger. Having been trained for a very long time, I've learned perhaps the hardest part of situations is the restraint NOT to fall into the violence. One of my teachers was an ex-green beret and martial arts teacher, and, he often faced situations requiring his restraint. In describing those situations, his hands would often shake, and you could see his system drain energy, into controlling anger.
I've also had similar. Couple times in large crowds of children I've been pushed, confronted, challenged, and, when the 'children' are over 6'4" and 300 pounds, it takes a LOT of energy to contain ones self.
Likewise watching some drunk punk hit your car, while you are both physically able, and armed able to 'restrain' or 'detain' the bad guy, but, by law, would jeopardize yourself, and, create a tremendous legal battle.
I've often wondered if the good guys couldn't use the same
inability to ID to strike back at folks in situations such as gang guys selling drugs, etc.
s