Covert Mission
New member
Well, I don't visit here often anymore, after being a regular for years. Here's a question to rattle the cage though, and stimulate some discussion:
Why does it seem like more than a few "name" instructors have inordinately large, or even massive, egos? (And no, I won't name names...they or the readers may know who I am talking about, and I am not here to "call out" any one individual). This observation is based both on personal experiences and numerous firsthand accounts from highly trusted sources, some of them very capable mil and LE vets and trainers themselves, who have remained humble. And yes, I took Psych 101, so I know that a healthy ego is important. Not talking about that.
Some of the Egos of whom I speak have respectable and in some cases remarkable credentials from past (or current) lives as active duty military or LE, including special operations and SWAT. That’s excellent…bravo. Giving credit where it's due, I commend you and thank you for your public service and service to country. You are the ones George Orwell referred to as (in paraphrase), the "rough men doing violence on our behalf so that we may sleep peacefully in our beds.” That said, there are tens of thousands of other mil and LE veterans who also were/are excellent in their respective, also very important, roles.
That experience and those credentials doesn't make you a God though, except maybe in your own mind, or the ultimate word on anything, imo. No one trainer is The Oracle of Tactical Truth to whom I will pay obeisance. If you are good or excellent in your post-SF/SWAT/LE role as a trainer, and can share that experience in an effective, powerful , respectful way without condescending to, belittling, or otherwise denigrating your students (or other good and proven instructors) or without otherwise being an arse, I will come to learn from you gratefully and part with my hard earned dollars and precious time.
I know and have trained with several "name" instructors who have had excellent, distinguished LE or Mil careers and now train us, Joe Lunchbox and Jane Minivan. They are humble, self-deprecating, appreciative, courteous and professional, though maybe not household names because they don't self-promote obsessively. One of these shakes his head upon hearing some of the horror stories about these egomaniacal trainers, peers in nearly every way except for attitude (and who may even lack something in teaching ability or personal skill, though they probably wouldn’t admit it). The opinion of this one is: "It's ridiculous and silly. Who needs to act that way? These guys put their pants on one leg at a time, I've done the same stuff in my past life, and until they can demonstrate their water walking, I'm not in awe." Maybe the problem is that they believe their own PR, which might be autobiographical and even embellished at times.
One source reported a story of a "big name" trainer (who was renting this instructor's home range for the weekend) who said loudly and with disgust within earshot of the resident ROs and others (and this after volunteering himself to help afterward to clean up the range and his own class’s mess himself), "I didn't know I was coming here to be a range n*gger." Exact quote. The range’s owner, who was amazed, was chastised later by a third, outside instructor (who had apparently heard a complaint from the “star”) for letting the "star" clean up after himself, by saying essentially "Don't you know who this guy is?" This "star" is a well known trainer and author who is published and touted in the gun rags and is a so-called guru in the tactical teaching and defensive pistol community. Another self-impressed trainer, on another day, said to my friend's RO who was standing close by respectfully listening to the Ego talk, "Get the f*ck away from my stuff." Sounds more like cliche movie stars behaving badly.
I believe, and sociologists support the theory, that we are living in an age of rampant and increasing narcissism and egotism. It makes life very unpleasant to deal with people like this. (As an aside, in my earlier 1st career I was acknowledged for a time as being near top of my profession on a national level but didn’t I consider that, or myself, as being any more special than anyone else who did their job well and worked hard (like my favorite plumber), something I always respect. Especially talented people who remain humble.
In that career I met people from all walks of life who were respected and recognized for being very talented, among the best at what they did. Some were celebrities and quite a few were actually truly famous. Some were nice people, many were not (usually the temporarily or newly famous were not, and the longtime famous were nicer). I don’t have the time of day for the jerks, beyond what I must tolerate for some required purpose, and even less if I am paying for their services. This old adage is true, I think: You can tell the character of a person by how they treat the waiter (or cab driver, or bodyguard, or clerk, or…). Certainly you can tell by how they treat their paying customers, and worthy colleagues.
Get over yourselves, egomaniacs.
Why does it seem like more than a few "name" instructors have inordinately large, or even massive, egos? (And no, I won't name names...they or the readers may know who I am talking about, and I am not here to "call out" any one individual). This observation is based both on personal experiences and numerous firsthand accounts from highly trusted sources, some of them very capable mil and LE vets and trainers themselves, who have remained humble. And yes, I took Psych 101, so I know that a healthy ego is important. Not talking about that.
Some of the Egos of whom I speak have respectable and in some cases remarkable credentials from past (or current) lives as active duty military or LE, including special operations and SWAT. That’s excellent…bravo. Giving credit where it's due, I commend you and thank you for your public service and service to country. You are the ones George Orwell referred to as (in paraphrase), the "rough men doing violence on our behalf so that we may sleep peacefully in our beds.” That said, there are tens of thousands of other mil and LE veterans who also were/are excellent in their respective, also very important, roles.
That experience and those credentials doesn't make you a God though, except maybe in your own mind, or the ultimate word on anything, imo. No one trainer is The Oracle of Tactical Truth to whom I will pay obeisance. If you are good or excellent in your post-SF/SWAT/LE role as a trainer, and can share that experience in an effective, powerful , respectful way without condescending to, belittling, or otherwise denigrating your students (or other good and proven instructors) or without otherwise being an arse, I will come to learn from you gratefully and part with my hard earned dollars and precious time.
I know and have trained with several "name" instructors who have had excellent, distinguished LE or Mil careers and now train us, Joe Lunchbox and Jane Minivan. They are humble, self-deprecating, appreciative, courteous and professional, though maybe not household names because they don't self-promote obsessively. One of these shakes his head upon hearing some of the horror stories about these egomaniacal trainers, peers in nearly every way except for attitude (and who may even lack something in teaching ability or personal skill, though they probably wouldn’t admit it). The opinion of this one is: "It's ridiculous and silly. Who needs to act that way? These guys put their pants on one leg at a time, I've done the same stuff in my past life, and until they can demonstrate their water walking, I'm not in awe." Maybe the problem is that they believe their own PR, which might be autobiographical and even embellished at times.
One source reported a story of a "big name" trainer (who was renting this instructor's home range for the weekend) who said loudly and with disgust within earshot of the resident ROs and others (and this after volunteering himself to help afterward to clean up the range and his own class’s mess himself), "I didn't know I was coming here to be a range n*gger." Exact quote. The range’s owner, who was amazed, was chastised later by a third, outside instructor (who had apparently heard a complaint from the “star”) for letting the "star" clean up after himself, by saying essentially "Don't you know who this guy is?" This "star" is a well known trainer and author who is published and touted in the gun rags and is a so-called guru in the tactical teaching and defensive pistol community. Another self-impressed trainer, on another day, said to my friend's RO who was standing close by respectfully listening to the Ego talk, "Get the f*ck away from my stuff." Sounds more like cliche movie stars behaving badly.
I believe, and sociologists support the theory, that we are living in an age of rampant and increasing narcissism and egotism. It makes life very unpleasant to deal with people like this. (As an aside, in my earlier 1st career I was acknowledged for a time as being near top of my profession on a national level but didn’t I consider that, or myself, as being any more special than anyone else who did their job well and worked hard (like my favorite plumber), something I always respect. Especially talented people who remain humble.
In that career I met people from all walks of life who were respected and recognized for being very talented, among the best at what they did. Some were celebrities and quite a few were actually truly famous. Some were nice people, many were not (usually the temporarily or newly famous were not, and the longtime famous were nicer). I don’t have the time of day for the jerks, beyond what I must tolerate for some required purpose, and even less if I am paying for their services. This old adage is true, I think: You can tell the character of a person by how they treat the waiter (or cab driver, or bodyguard, or clerk, or…). Certainly you can tell by how they treat their paying customers, and worthy colleagues.
Get over yourselves, egomaniacs.
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