Who is the better person, the soldier who is willing to fight and die for you against Osama (serving others) or the guy that sits at home serving himself?
What if that guy sitting at home is a brilliant physician saving the lives of hundreds of children each year? Or maybe he's a mechanic who treats his customers with respect and makes sure they don't get ripped off or drive unsaef vehicles? Maybe he's a computer tech that gives free advice and support to the older people at his company that would otherwise have to sit on hold to talk to some guy in New Delhi?
I don't see a soldier as a better person simply because he's willing to fight in a war. One deserves respect for that, no doubt, but not adoration and self-sacrifice should never be used as the sole elevator for one's character. Thus in the case of your question neither one can be labeled the better person with the information you've given. You could be comparing an honest, trustworthy mechanic against an alcoholic, wife beating soldier.
Devotion to friends and family, is that for self gratification and reward for self or for them?
Both. That's what friends and family means to me. We all give and take willingly, we care and support for each other. Why do you believe it has to be one or the other?
You see your father (you said) was in the military and served us (if he was in our military, who knows ) in any event he served others. Is he better than the guy who only wants to sit around and do a line of coke to get his day going?
Of course not. My father's military and LE service does not make him a better person. His character and integrity made him a good person but that's not to say that the guy doing coke isn't a good person. That coke "fiend" may get up on Sunday morning, do a few bumps, then spend the next 14 hours working on his and his neighbor's yards. The fact that he uses cocaine instead of coffee to wake up him doesn't make him a bad person; only his actions in regards to others can define that.
But simple descriptors like the ones you suggested can't be used to measure the quality of an individual. Again, there are many horrible people serving in the military. Public and/or government service does not make a good person.
Liberals are more self oriented and conservatives think more of service.
Bull. Liberals are the ones demanding universal health care. That's self oriented? Please; I'm not a fan of many liberal ideals but conservatives are not saints and are just as greedy and self centered as any other group. You're trying to villify one group while hastily duct taping a halo to yours.
Conservatives do not think of "service" any more than liberals do. Or do you believe that people simple cannot be good without devotion to a higher power? Are only religious people good? Are only Christians good?
That's my opinion, who is better is left up to what your beliefs are but you should be happy that someone is willing to fight Osama if you are not.
You have no idea what I am or am not willing to do.