Normal people don't live in isolated castles with everyone in the family going to their well armed bedrooms at 10pm sharp.
Well, 10's a little late (but hey, the day starts early this time of year, and 3:30am comes quick), but the rest you described is pretty "normal" around here.
Out here in the hinterlands, things are isolated, pretty much everyone is armed, and you hear shooting all the time, day and night, on "normal" days, so its by no means, an uncommon sound.
Police response can be a half hour or more, unless youre lucky enough to have a Trooper in the area.
If you arent prepared to take care of things by yourself, then youre not being realistic in your planning.
And while I agree about the lack of planning part with some people, from what Ive seen, that tends to go down and become more of an issue, the closer you go towards civilization, where more reliance on, and the expectation of others to take care of you, seems to go up.
Guns are just a part of a pretty broad plan, and generally, towards the bottom of it in the progression of order, if you arent normally wearing one all the time.
Around here, if they make it past the electronics and various "alert" critters, they have to deal with the dogs, (250 or so pounds of very family protective Rottweiller), who live in the house, and go with you everywhere. You dont get close, let alone in, without them knowing (we knew you were here, long before you got close to the house), and if by some chance you did, we will know just where you are, and by the way things are going, who you are.
Next to good, reliable weapons systems, and the practiced familiarity of their use, good dogs are really your best bet. They are a proactive alarm system that responds instantly, giving you time to decide and deal.