The OP's comparison wasn't really all that good. He was shooting underpowered loads. It's not surprising they wouldn't cycle the auto; recoil springs are set for a certain power band, and his rounds didn't make the low end.
While this is true, the point is that it is not an issue with a revolver. So long as the load is powerful enough to make it out of the barrel, it will work in a revolver.
Practical reliability should use the loads one would actually carry, or range loads at similar power levels. Anybody who carries an auto for defense without first verifying what loads it likes is foolish. But once those loads have been identified, reliability is generally not an issue.
Ideally you're right. However, if your selection of ammunition is severely limited, as it was for many people a couple of years ago, then you need to be able to use what is available. If you're using an auto and your gun isn't reliable with the ammo that's available, you're up a tree without a leaf.
Bullet configuration may cause feed issues, but those can be pretty quickly identified and eliminated (either by polishing, or by selection of bullet types that feed without handgun modification).
Again, under ideal circumstances you'd be correct. However, most people are not competent enough with gunsmithing work to go polishing parts of their handguns. Polishing also would have done no good in the OP's case because his problem was an ejection rather than feeding issue. Selection of bullet type also only works if you've got a wide variety of ammunition to choose from.
But once one has found ammo that works reliably, and assuming one does at least the minimum required maintenance, a good auto will match revolver reliability, or come so close as to be a statistical wash.
And here we come to one of those big "ifs".
If you can find ammo that works reliably (you may not have been able to in '09) and
if you do a minimum amount of maintenance (many people don't) then the reliability difference between an auto and a revolver is nearly negligible. Both of those, however, are pretty big "ifs".
Another factor here is that the minimum maintenance on an auto is more extensive than that of a revovler. While both types need routine cleaning and lubrication, one should, if they plan to depend on an auto, also replace certain springs periodically (recoil, extractor, and magazine springs in particular). With the exception of those that have fallen victim to a poor kitchen table gunsmith, revolvers very rarely wear out their springs. I don't believe I've ever encountered a revolver with springs that were weakened to the point of unreliability. I have, however, seen several autos that were unreliable because of weak recoil, extractor, or magazine springs.