Wife calls and says man at door wont leave.

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A dog of substance will deter an individual even if they are gentle dog. Small dog are only alarms or yappers that are easy to kick aside. And if she shot the guy get ready for a big money loss in lawyer fees and bail.
 
Great thread. I have had similar circumstances happen at my home with my wife.

My wife is a bit more gun knowledgeable than the OPs, but she still needs some training. And untill Christmas, she has never had a gun of her own. There is a S&W Bodyguard .38spl with laser under the tree for her!

Thaks PAX, I just ordered your book to go along with the S&W! What a great gift pair, the gun and the book!
 
TheNocturnus said:
My wife is a decent judge of character but a little naive when it comes to dealing with people at the door. I plan on having more discussions about this in the future and creating a plan in case something happens again.
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My wife won't have anything to do with guns, either. I have offered to teach her to shoot, but she is adamant that guns are bad. Yet she acknowledges that she is nervous at home alone, especially if I have to work late or attend an evening meeting.

We do have an alarm, and she keeps that one when I'm not home. She won't open the door to a stranger, so that's a plus. That should be ground rule #1. For your wife, I would suggest that you install a two-way intercom to the front door. If possible, the indoor station should be somewhere that allows your wife to see who is at the door without them being able to see her -- or even know where she might be in the house.

You should also install a supplementary deadlock on the front and rear door. The best kind are the ones with a vertical bolt that locks the door half and the jamb half together, like this one from Lowe's:

018418153232lg.jpg
 
Pax hit a couple of home runs on this thread...I agree with her that putting on a handgun when you wake up and carrying all day long until you go to bed,,,not only becomes habit,,,I would always carry my handgun in the house or out, just like I would not go out without my pants on...After years of routinely doing this it does not change your lifestyle at all,,,in fact it has improved mine, and your handgun is always there when you need it on your person, not in the other room or in the car or in the safe.

Her other point of logic in putting seeds of questions in a person's mind and letting them take it from there to draw their own conclusions instead of mentally strongarming them,,,should work with both females and males, very subtle and diplomatic,,,yet hopefully getting the desired results.

I do not answer the door or the phone,,,but I am not a recluse,,,and have a lifetime of Boy Scout Popcorn to prove it and my Wife and I have eaten a ton of Girl Scout cookies. I quess I just don't answer the door to adults and I have thought since I always look from a side window to see who it is,,,how I would handle a medical emergency....If a person looked like they had a medical emergency I would ask them through the closed and locked door what was wrong,,,and if they replied they needed medical help,,,I would pause and then tell them to stay where they were that I had just called 911 and an ambulance and the police were on the way....If they did not run off at that point,,,I would then call 911. As most people have cell phones these days and since I live in the middle of the city,,,the police, fire, hospitals, gas stations, grocery stores, etc are all no more than five or ten minutes away.
 
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Thanks for the advice Pax. I will look into getting the book. I try to discuss scenarios with my wife and she just thinks i'm paranoid. I have been a victim of armed robbery thrice in my life so I think I am justified in thinking of worst case scenarios.

I will take your advice and ask questions and kind of be indirectly planting the seeds of self defense thinking. Thanks.
 
Trained the wife to tell solicitors "my husband is in the back yard cleaning his shotguns with his biker buddies, told me not to bother him unless it's a life or death situation."

Always assumed the "I want to talk to your husband" line was a ploy to see if she were alone.

There are also two mastiffs in the house.

Good luck.
 
O/P asked about his wife who shows little interest to no interest in firearms. For most every person in the USA, 98% plus, carrying a gun constantly during one's waking hours at home is considered idiotic. Having a firearm within easy reach makes more sense especially if you have a dog or two or ten at home. Regardless, a gun is not the answer here, let alone suggesting constant carry even while at home. Best advice, don't answer the door, dogs, which are in the house in question and are a great deterrent, an alarm/panic button, and possibly pepper spray. This really is not a firearms related question as it is not an option for the O/P's wife at this time.
 
For most every person in the USA, 98% plus, carrying a gun constantly during one's waking hours at home is considered idiotic.
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I completely disagree. How can you call anyone wanting to protect themselves idiotic? Seems pretty intelligent to me. If I ever need a gun I will need it right away and when it is always on me, it is always available.

I would rather my wife have a gun than pepper spray or to put our dogs at risk. A BG that enters my house illegally and wants to do harm needs to be stopped, period. Pepper spray and/or my little dogs will not do it but pieces of metal traveling at a high velocity and impacting some vital organs will.
 
Aberrational behavior may not be considered strange by the practitioner but "constant-carry" of a gun around the house? Really? I suppose someone could rationalize anything. How many back-up guns should one carry as well? Since your wife will not join you and the 1% or .01% or whatever, and engage in "constant-carry," then I would do as much as possible to make your home as safe as possible. Lot of good suggestions in the thread. OPSEC
 
Aberrational behavior may not be considered strange by the practitioner but "constant-carry" of a gun around the house? Really? I suppose someone could rationalize anything. How many back-up guns should one carry as well? Since your wife will not join you and the 1% or .01% or whatever, and engage in "constant-carry," then I would do as much as possible to make your home as safe as possible. Lot of good suggestions in the thread. OPSEC
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My gun is part of my daily wardrobe. Just like I put socks on in the morning, I put my gun on. I paid for my CCW permit and I intend to use the heck out of it. I actually feel naked without my gun on my hip. It does not bother me or my wife that I carry in the home. To each their own I guess.
 
It does not bother me either. Where I live the LEO response time to 911 calls is over 30 minutes. People around here don't get much trouble as we all have dogs and guns, I've just never met anyone who walks around the house every day, all day, and night, with a gun strapped on. You cannot deny that it is aberrational behavior and is considered odd, sort of a "nut-job" type of deal by most people, even gun owners. Whatever works for you, go for it, but by definition you would have to remain in constant condition "orange" if you are armed, just to be safe, and that is no way to live in my opinion. Condition "white," i.e. relaxation, when you are home, is one of the good things in life. OPSEC
 
jmortimer, a gun you have stashed somewhere in the house is a gun waiting to be found by a burglar.

The more guns you have within reach, the more guns you have left to be found by burglars, your kids, your kids' friends...

OTOH, the gun that is on your person is not available to any of the above.

I find people who keep guns stashed throughout the house very hard to fathom; to me, that seems idiotic.

My carry gun is on me; others are locked in a 7 and 8 gauge Sturdy safe, with heavy duty fireproofing, stainless plate to defeat torches, and ball bearing plate to defeat drill bits.

A skilled burglar, with good tools, will break into that safe in a matter of several minutes.

A casual burglar or hophead is not getting into that safe. At over 1,000 pounds, that safe is unlikely to be easily moved, either.

But the gun or guns that are within my reach are also under my total control, apparently unlike yours.
 
MLeake said:
jmortimer, a gun you have stashed somewhere in the house is a gun waiting to be found by a burglar.

The more guns you have within reach, the more guns you have left to be found by burglars, your kids, your kids' friends...

OTOH, the gun that is on your person is not available to any of the above.

I find people who keep guns stashed throughout the house very hard to fathom; to me, that seems idiotic.

My carry gun is on me; others are locked in a 7 and 8 gauge Sturdy safe, with heavy duty fireproofing, stainless plate to defeat torches, and ball bearing plate to defeat drill bits.

A skilled burglar, with good tools, will break into that safe in a matter of several minutes.

A casual burglar or hophead is not getting into that safe. At over 1,000 pounds, that safe is unlikely to be easily moved, either.

But the gun or guns that are within my reach are also under my total control, apparently unlike yours.
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+1

I don't understand the logic in people who knock on people like you and I Leake or Kathy J. it just doesn't make sense to me. Ok if you don't do it. I won't knock on you. I'll give my $0.02 ($0.01 after Obama Care) in a respectful way if you ask. To me it's an article of clothing. All the way until I go to bed at night. Like Leake said, no need to leave it out for others to find. Anyone, whether family or not. It doesn't bother me it's not a hassle, I feel safer with it. And no. To the person earlier who said "move if you feel unsafe" that's the more idiotic comments on this thread too. 1 to assume I'm unsafe..I'm the one carrying 24/7 you should be the one feeling unsafe. And 2. If people in my city moved every time they felt unsafe, we'd be playing musical chairs with our homes in a never ending cycle.

Laughed again at the thought of some logic people think they have to lash out negatively on someone that means nothing to them. Lol. Does it really matter that much to you to want to change what I do?

Here let me leave my gun on my bed before I use the bathroom.

Everyone has a story and a reason why they're the way they are. If you've had a perfect life where your door was never kicked in and you weren't in LE and you never had a gun jammed into your ribs. That's wonderful for you. I'm happy.

Just coincidentally..a lot of us are also gun enthusiasts and refuse to be sheep.


:) thank you


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This thread is getting a little off topic. I didn't want this to turn into a carry at home debate.

If you carry at home: awesome!
If you don't carry at home: awesome!

Just do what you think is best for you, whether someone thinks it is aberrational behavior or not.

Back on topic:
My wife and I discussed this at length last night. She understands my concerns and she said that she needs to work on dealing with strangers. She told the guy that I was not at home and she kicked herself immediately after she said it to him. She realized that statement could have put her in danger.

I said earlier that I don't feel any dog should be used for protection and last night my wife said she wants a big dog. lol.

She feels that a large dog would be more of a deterrent to a would be criminal, and while I agree with that I still don't want my dog in harms way.

She wants to wait until our daughter is born and a few years old before we even consider getting another dog. Until then I hope we can work on her SA and get her more comfortable with the idea of firing a gun at an intruder.
 
Just a thought about dogs. I feel they are part of the family too but I would rather them in harms way then my wife or kid.
 
"But the gun or guns that are within my reach are also under my total control, apparently unlike yours"
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I agree it would be stupid to "stash" guns around the house. I never said that. I said I had a firearm within easy reach. Everything you assumed or said about the deployment of my firearm(s) was based on ignorance of my situation and you "guessed" wrong. If I hear the dogs barking I am ready.
 
Assuming you don't have stashes, then you are apparently assuming you will have time to get to a specific room, and have time to use a key or enter a combo.

This assumes you recognize the dogs barking as being for a threat, as opposed to a squirrel or the mailman. (Most of us tend to tune out most barking; not everybody recognizes differences, if you do, great, but you still seem to assume you will have time to do whatever you need to do.)

It's simpler to just have one on one's person. Doesn't matter where you are in the house; doesn't matter why the dogs bark.

Edit: TheNocturnus, I have K9 cop friends who love their dogs; but those dogs have the exact function of going in harm's way. I love my dogs; I have put myself between my dogs and aggressive dogs before. That said, if it comes to my wife or kid, or one of the dogs, the dog is just out of luck.
 
This thread is about operational security at one's home, and more specifically, what to do when your wife is home alone and she will not embrace firearms. From the data I have seen, 23% of women own firearms and 77% do not. 54% of males do not own fire arms and 46% do.
Most households do not have a firearm, 47% yes and 53% no firearm.
http://www.gallup.com/poll/150353/self-reported-gun-ownership-highest-1993.aspx
So most married men and women for that matter, will not have a spouse who wants to use firearms. The best advice here, in my opinion was dogs, alarms, hardened barriers, not answering the door, etc. The issue of how do I get my wife to brandish firearms when she is not willing to do so is axiomatic. Even if you could somehow pressure the person to do so it would be unsafe.
 
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