"....I also noticed that I was almost jerking the gun forward in anticipation of recoil. honestly, I'm not scared of my gun, or its recoil, it's just something that I'm doing without even thinking about it...."
That's still flinching. It isnt a matter of being afraid of it, its anticipating it before it happens which is what you are doing. It's a subconcious reaction. A good dry fire regimen will help deal with that, as would a lot of rimfire practice.
Whether you realize it or not, and though you feel you like it, the 40 may be more than you can comfortably and effectively shoot at this point. You may overcome it with training and practice, or you may not. It's more important to be able to shoot well, than what you ar shooting. Misses or poor hits, no matter what round/magic bullet, are not better than a good hit with a "lesser" round. If you don't start a dramatic improvement with the .40 after getting a good dryfire regimen going, and shooting your friends .22 for a few weeks, I'd seriously consider trading for a G-19 in 9mm. They feel like an overgrown .22 to me. .40's are a bit more sharp in recoil. Don't get hung up in the numbers, get hung up in effective shooting.
I was started on .22's, and probably shot at least 40,000 to 60,000 rds of .22's in handguns before doing any amount of centerfire shooting. I think it makes a huge difference. I wouldnt suggest anyone start out on a centerfire handgun. Perhaps some have done it and done decent shooting, but I also see many posts by guys that say they get X size groups @ 10 or 15 yards, and are happy with them. I feel a fair shooter should be able to keep groups under 2" @ 25 yards to get excited, or feel they're really getting somewhere (yeah, thats standing on your hind feet, no rest). Tons of rimfire shooting in a high quality handgun, and good instruction, can make that realistic. If you're serious about learning to shoot, rimfire can get you hitting things thrown in the air, relatively small targets at long range, (like out to a couple hundred yards) running small game, empty shotgun shells in fast shooting, etc. None of those things are the least bit unrealistic if you're motivated.
Edit: was just looking at the goshen site. Both eyes should be open in any sighting not just with theirs. I'm not convinced of the goshen sight system. It looks like its been around for a couple years, and so far, hasn't taken the world by storm. Results come from mastering the basics, and experience, not gadget sights. I'll read more about it later.