Staying calm in tense situation?

The one thing that helped me in fight situations, I had done it many times, over and over.

At the age of 33 visiting England 1968, stayed with the Mother in Law, out for supper with Brother in Law, and Wife, my Wife's Sister.

Indian Restaurant, Town St Helens. Name The Moonglow.

Cut to the chase, I was dragged into a confrontation with 4 young toughs (Youths here!) the leader of these 4, wanted to cause trouble, beat up guy in Sports Coat and collar and tie, wearing glasses (Me) with shinny black shoes (steel toe caps, left at M in L's when I left England in 1965)

It started as an appeasement move on my part, approaching the 4 sitting at a booth (empty plates in front of them!) with 10 shilling note showing in top pocket, would have bought 4 pints then.

Me with smile on face, no thought, plan, nothing at all.

As the mouth/leader, suddenly noted how close I was getting to him, his legs already swung out, started to rise, fists coming up.

My flat foot, heel first hit him center chest. (3 ribs broken) his head flew backwards, hitting bad guy #2 in nose (broke nose #1) guy on left side of booth, feet now facing out, hands on knees to stand (lazy move, plus bad one)
my overhand right fist crushed his nose (broke nose#2) his companion on that bench climbed over the booth, walked on table, among plates of the 3 young people eating there. Who started to stab him in the legs, with forks they had in their hands! And they were noncombatants!

When he had arrived at the end of the table, with much aw-aw-ing! those fork hits hurt. As he jumped, I swung the chair I had collected (broken arm #1)

That is when I kicked a man in a brown suite, sat with his Wife, on my right, in the chest (he had jumped to his feet, combatant?) he sat down against the wall, trying to breath.

As this was happening, a young chap had a fork half way to his mouth, wall seat on my left. His only comment "Just like Gun Smoke" Dessie Arness?

I chased them out of the door with chair. Called 999 Police.

"I have been attacked by 4 men in the Moonglow"

Five minutes, Police sirens, two cars two Officers. I was corrected "You are not in America Sir, Constables"

After hearing my version, punctuated with a Lady saying "What did you kick my Husband for" One Constable went outside to consult his Radio.

The only apparent damage to me, cut knuckles, right hand.

Cop now consulting his notes, "Those 4 ruffians who attacked you, early 20s, medium height, blue jeans, white tee shirts?"

Yes Sir. Said I. "Well they are in the Cottage Hospital, Emerg".

"Three broken ribs, same person, two broken noses, one broken arm" "And various cuts, and contusions" "A Question, was you the attacker, or the attacked?"

Much thanks from the owner? Escorted to my rented VW, advice on the way to Liverpool City, who had way more Indians. Hard to drive that stick shift, after adrenalin kicked in.

Why was it so easy? I had been in dozens of fights prior to this one. It just flows, almost like a dance. Would a gun fight be as easy? I honestly do not know. I have been through the motions, in IDPA matches hundred's of time, with a real antagonist? that is the 64,000 question, yes?
 
There are two kinds of training that can be done. The first is to train for situations...The other is to train your temperament; that is, to adopt a mindset of looking for and evaluating solutions to problems with which you are confronted rather than feeling and acting in a panicked manner. This may come from inside you, from delving into a religious faith, meditation, counsel, or some combination.

This. Practice situations so that you have muscle memory and also practice performing in a stressful environment so you learn to calm down and think. I learned this in wrestling - I could beat a new guy by just letting him spaz for 20 seconds and exhaust himself, even if he was much bigger and stronger, because he didnt know how to breathe, relax, etc. Believe it or not when people start wrestling their first month when they wrestle they actually hold their breath because they just floundered and tensed up because they were not used to that adrenaline. When that adrenaline kicks in we are in a whole different state. You need to know how you will react in that state and practice in that state of mind as often as possible. I learned more about my body in a few seasons of wrestling than a lifetime of other sports.
 
The one thing that helped me in fight situations, I had done it many times, over and over.

At the age of 33 visiting England 1968, stayed with the Mother in Law, out for supper with Brother in Law, and Wife, my Wife's Sister.

Indian Restaurant, Town St Helens. Name The Moonglow.

Cut to the chase, I was dragged into a confrontation with 4 young toughs (Youths here!) the leader of these 4, wanted to cause trouble, beat up guy in Sports Coat and collar and tie, wearing glasses (Me) with shinny black shoes (steel toe caps, left at M in L's when I left England in 1965)

It started as an appeasement move on my part, approaching the 4 sitting at a booth (empty plates in front of them!) with 10 shilling note showing in top pocket, would have bought 4 pints then.

Me with smile on face, no thought, plan, nothing at all.

As the mouth/leader, suddenly noted how close I was getting to him, his legs already swung out, started to rise, fists coming up.

My flat foot, heel first hit him center chest. (3 ribs broken) his head flew backwards, hitting bad guy #2 in nose (broke nose #1) guy on left side of booth, feet now facing out, hands on knees to stand (lazy move, plus bad one)
my overhand right fist crushed his nose (broke nose#2) his companion on that bench climbed over the booth, walked on table, among plates of the 3 young people eating there. Who started to stab him in the legs, with forks they had in their hands! And they were noncombatants!

When he had arrived at the end of the table, with much aw-aw-ing! those fork hits hurt. As he jumped, I swung the chair I had collected (broken arm #1)

That is when I kicked a man in a brown suite, sat with his Wife, on my right, in the chest (he had jumped to his feet, combatant?) he sat down against the wall, trying to breath.

As this was happening, a young chap had a fork half way to his mouth, wall seat on my left. His only comment "Just like Gun Smoke" Dessie Arness?

I chased them out of the door with chair. Called 999 Police.

"I have been attacked by 4 men in the Moonglow"

Five minutes, Police sirens, two cars two Officers. I was corrected "You are not in America Sir, Constables"

After hearing my version, punctuated with a Lady saying "What did you kick my Husband for" One Constable went outside to consult his Radio.

The only apparent damage to me, cut knuckles, right hand.

Cop now consulting his notes, "Those 4 ruffians who attacked you, early 20s, medium height, blue jeans, white tee shirts?"

Yes Sir. Said I. "Well they are in the Cottage Hospital, Emerg".

"Three broken ribs, same person, two broken noses, one broken arm" "And various cuts, and contusions" "A Question, was you the attacker, or the attacked?"

Much thanks from the owner? Escorted to my rented VW, advice on the way to Liverpool City, who had way more Indians. Hard to drive that stick shift, after adrenalin kicked in.

Why was it so easy? I had been in dozens of fights prior to this one. It just flows, almost like a dance. Would a gun fight be as easy? I honestly do not know. I have been through the motions, in IDPA matches hundred's of time, with a real antagonist? that is the 64,000 question, yes?
Were you offered a position with the Kingsmen, as well?

Well done....glad you came out safe.
 
I have always believed that hunting was a good way to learn to control stress and emotions. This is especially true, if hunting a wild animal that could hurt you, like a wild pig (have never hunted bear). But even when hunting a groundhog or coyote, there is a certain amount of adrenalin that rushes in, from excitement, when you see a potential target. The more you hunt the better you get a calming yourself, and I have found these lessons to be helpful in other non hunting situations as well.
 
Keeping your head while not losing the flow. It's what you do when you drive a car properly. So, drive properly and you'll have your practice session in a REAL potentially lethal situation.
 
The best lesson for me happened as a youngster. I was with my father when we got involved with an emergency. My father was a cool as could be so I thought that's what I have to learn.
 
I drive really, really defensively. I hate being a wuss but I avoid any
possible confrontation.
So far, so good.
I have stories but they don't give this thread a conclusion.

I don't carry unless I am going way out of town and travel the hi-way at night.
I just pay attention to all the ass-holes and don't get involved with
the way they drive or approach me.

The best advice for anyone on this forum is "know the situations."

Here in the big city, a fool would go to the 7/11 at 2 am for a donut.
Avoid the scum friggin' thugs.
No need to defend yourself with a hand gun when you can simply
avoid the pieces of crap that will cap you for your watch.

I think a lot of you are waiting for the opportunity to use your stuff.
Don't think like that. Avoid the pricks.
You know that the law is stacked against you, defending you life.

It is wrong. Look at the law officers now that won't even get out of the
patrol car. If they do and engage some criminal... they are going down.
Al Sharpton will turn you into a monster in a "black lives matter' heart beat.
 
Steiner,
Good answer. people here in Tn. drive totally different than those from the North East. I have to go into a different mind set when driving here that greatly differs then when I'm in NJ or East Coast of Fl.
As long as I remember this, I can usually keep myself from getting really angry
and can just let it pass so I don't stroke out.

I don't agree that a lot of people who carry are just looking for an excuse to go
"Billy the Kid". Just MHO.

Doc
 
I live in New Mexico. I take it for granted that at least 95% of the people driving are not to be trusted as they will: make a left turn from the right lane in front of you; make a right turn from the left lane in front of you; run red lights ("It was orange...really"); go 50 miles an hour on the expressway in the left lane pacing the person in the right lane and obstructing traffic; whip around you and cut you off, slam on the brakes for no apparent reason, etc. etc.

So, I leave at least one vehicle space / 10mph in front of mine, drive from the front of my car to at least a 1/2 mile ahead of my vehicle and the same to rear so that I can observe patterns of other drivers and attempt to anticipate what they're going to do; and void the obvious "problem drivers" by getting out of their way or as far ahead of, or in back of them as possible.

The only time I use my horn is when: someone is going to crash into my car if I don't signal them; or if I'm sitting at a light and they continue texting for 30+ seconds after the left arrow or green light has illuminated. I then give them the very briefest horn signal through a quick tap on the horn button just to get them back to driving instead of texting.

Generally, I put with bad driving from other people and avoid all confrontations as it's not worth my time, and the aggravation of dealing with some lunatic who has to be "right."

I just let them do whatever they want to do and attempt to stay out of their way and as far away from them as possible.
 
Driving in and around Orlando, Florida? Is a definitely fraught with potential heart attacks!

When in traffic, and a vehicle is a foot! Off my rear bumper (Security, marked Jeep) three tinny taps on the break pedal, does not cause a slow down, just flashes all those break lights!

I would say almost always causes a drop back, never caused any kind of road rage situation.

If some one cuts in front of me, way to close, I just think they want that few feet of road, and I ease up, drop back.

I am never in a hurray, leave with plenty of time to spare.
 
Back
Top