Attack of the Fattest Ninja EVA!

Haha, I love it! :D

The image is forever burned into my memory. :)

stephen426, I guess about every major thread has a Kill-joy... And, well, congratulations to you.
 
Yo Joe! It's Snake Eyes!

http://www.myuselessknowledge.com/joe/snakes.html

snakes.gif
 
Sum1 Special said:
I guess about every major thread has a Kill-joy... And, well, congratulations to you.
Click to expand...

I guess it is much easier discussing hypothetical situations that we have almost no chance of getting into (provided you are not law enforcement, living in the ghetto, or going around looking for trouble) rather than facing a national epidemic. Your so right. I apologize for being a realist.

Some people have no common sense and discuss everything from a "tactical" stand point, when the ounce of prevention often eliminates the need for a pound of cure. Besides, I thought I was on your ignore list. Please put me back on! :rolleyes:


Space,
I do like that picture though and I hope I have not offended you. I really was being sincere about it. Some people have just come to accept it as a fact and give up. Take care and I'll keep an eye out for a big ninja when the kiddies go trick or treating! I'll give you an apple!
 
no worries, stephen426... its good advice, and i've been putting off going to the gym. been paying my dues for longer than i care to admit, and i just never go. i suppose i can say i was waiting until this picture was taken, now i can go work off my tactic-roll. :D

there is a benchmade clipped to a belt loop, but its under one of the rolls of fat. mind you, this was a light load day, no need to gear up with all the doodads and knicknacks since i was surrounded by other fat commandos all day long.

i stopped carrying throwing stars when i started wearing the gloves. they just slip between my chubby fingers. doesnt help when they're still greasy from the cinnamon roll i had for a power snack.
 
:eek: Run! Run! It's a gun-sporting ninja! aaaaarrrgghhhhhhhh!! ... WHY, oh why did I view that while eating lunch at work. LOL.

Just kidding! Thanks for the picture. It was a good one. As serious as this world can be at times, as well as gun ownership and use, it's always therapeutic to have some fun, too!

Sent you a PM.
 
i do appreciate the encouragement to lose weight. heres two pics from 3 years and 25 lbs ago.

spiffwithhair.jpg

spiffontheleft.jpg

both taken in prince william sound. the skinny guy on the right is my boss. to put it in perspective, he tips the scales at 140.
 
Space,

You are a beast! I bet you can lift some serious weight. Now go get to the gym and work off your tactical fat. The chicks at the gym will be checking you out in no time you big stud muffin you! :D Your fat, I'm ugly... At least you can loose the weight!:eek: :D
 
Spaceman,
I also have a bit of tactical fat. I believe tacti-fat has the ability to repel and stop bulletts. :D



Honestly though I hope to work it off. I have a somewhat similar build as you (maybe a little less fat).
 
No Killflash on optic: -2 points
Balaclava: +3 points
Rail system on weapon: +2 points
Rails left unused: -1 point per rail
All black outfit: +2 points
Pants not tucked into boots: -2 points
No body armor: -1 point
Tacti-roll substitute for body armor: +1 point
Protective eyewear: +1 point
Orange lenses for eyewear: -1 point
Beta C-Mag: +3 points
No grenade launcher cut-out on barrel: -2 points
No grenade launcher: -1 point
Surefire vertical foregrip light: +2 points
Sidearm not carried in tactical thigh holster: -2 points


Gee Spiff, looks like you broke even to me. :p
 
Despite how humerous that first pic is, that is not the most "mall ninja" AR I've ever seen....I've seen some wannabe AKs that are worse, and a LOT of AR's that are worse.

As for the ninja itself......... I'd like to see him do a tacti-cool "SWAT"-style rappeling entrance through someone's windows.....:p . Thanks for the humour, Spaceman
 
psshaawwww!!!! heres how i calculate the ninjatude:

colt rifle (not a cheap knockoff :D ) = +1
surefire foreend = +4
surefire vert fore grip with light and nav lights = +3
tactical sling = +1
trijicon tri-power optic = +3 (thats THREE power sources! actually four but we'll keep it at three just for funsies)
arms buis = +2 (has two apertures: big and small)
tactical fat = +3 (calculated by how many skunkabillies it would take to make one of me :p )
cell phone set to 'Tactical Silent Ringing Mode' = +1
sharp instrument on belt loop = +1
belt designed to hold up a gun = +1
sidearm carried IWB so as not to scare the sheeple = +1
all black uniform, including underoos = +1
balaclava = +1
tactical eye protection = +1
thats a total of 24. now lets do the deficiencies.

rails unused = -3
no killflash = -2
pants untucked = -2 (but i got a good excuse, my legs are so short i have to roll them up which makes them not fit into my boots)
no grenade launcher cutout on barrel = -2 (hey i wasnt gonna wait another month for WA to get more 6920's! the 6721 is just as good! plus i can use lighter bullets with that 1 in 9 twist)
no grenade launcher ducttaped to barrel = -1 (ran out of ducttape the last time i strapped kitchen plates to my torso before going to the mall to watch a movie)
orange lenses on eyewear = -1 (but they give so much more clarity over the darker lenses!)
no tactical thigh holster = -2 (havent found a thigh holster that has straps to cover my 28" thunder thighs)
i still have like, 13 points of ninjatude!


edit - even though no one noticed it i'll take another point deduction for my vert foregrip being desert tan and not black to match the rest of my furniture.
 
>havent found a thigh holster that has straps to cover my 28" thunder thighs<

Spiffy: get whatever thigh holster you want, and just replace the straps with standard belts from the surplus store. They SHOULD be long enough... ;)

And I'm STILL waiting for those pics... :mad:
 
Alright kids, let's compare and contrast...

IMG_0368.jpg


Colt rifle: +1
KAC forend (the original milspec rail system used in SOPMOD M4 package): +5
Unused rails covered: +1
Plain jane vertical grip: +1
Tactical sling: +1
Trijicon TA31RCO-M4: +4 because you admitted it was better than yours once (http://thefiringline.com/forums/showthread.php?t=172153)
Killflash on optic: +2
GG&G MAD BUIS: +2
Tactical fat: +0 (I lost 13 pounds in the last two months)
Cell phone set to 'Tactical Silent Ringing Mode': +1
Gerber Multitool: +1
Belt designed to hold up enormous 1st Cav belt buckle: +1
Woodland camouflage BDUs, minus shirt so I can better show off my huge pectoral muscles and rippling washboard abs ( :rolleyes: ): +2
Boonie hat: +1
Interceptor body armor with Blackhawk accessories: +3
IR strobe for signaling helicopters for pickup from hot LZ: +2
Pants tucked into boots (not seen in photo, but there): +1
Tactical background for photo: +1

That's 30, let's go to deficiencies.

Mismatching camo: -2 (haven't seen my woodland boonie since I moved)
Rails unused: -3
No grenade launcher cutout: -2 (Wild was out of 6920s when I picked one up, too)
No grenade launcher ducttaped to barrel: -1
No eyewear: -1
No sidearm or thigh holster: -5 (I couldn't find the quick-release attachment for it at the time, but I found it two days later)
No Surefire vertical foregrip with main light and nav LEDs: -3 (It's on order though, check Wild's computer)
Cell phone with non-matte finish showing: -1
Didn't apply camouflage make-up to exposed skin: -1

Okay, so I have 11, but with a single package postmarked from Anchorage and my thigh holster buckled on (which would take me to 19), I could totally top your ninjatude! :D ;)
 
IZs gonna win his surefire (which is on the way ) vertical foregrip light is more expensive and has more toys than Spiffs.

Spiffs a wannabe :)

WildhehasnomagpulrangerplatesAlaska
 
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