Mag,
The guy with the hatchet took on three armed cops, all bigger'n him, with handguns pointed right at him. He was actually able to strike the SIG in one officer's hand with it. Things happen fast & close, and some of these people are just so far out of it that they don't even care what they're facing, they'll still attack.
I wouldn't count on your size to save you through intimidation.
Many years ago it took five of us to remove one determined guy from a courthouse who couldn't have weighed more than 150 pounds at around 5'6".
I learned early on the business that once somebody's made up his or her mind, physical size on either side of the equation is not a determining factor in pursuing the goal of killing, and that doesn't even apply to the use of a gun. On either side.
Not to belittle your martial arts background, but it doesn't stop a bullet.
If you're getting 900-1000 FPS (typical .380 ACP velocity range in 3-4-inch barrels) through your snub with handloads, you're stressing it.
Cartridges Of The World shows 800-1000 FPS for the .380, and 630-700 FPS for the .38 S&W.
SAAMI pressure limits of 21,500 for the .380 ACP and 15,500 for the .38 S&W would show further differences between the two rounds, and I can't see you pulling off .380 velocities through your short barrel without creating pressures far beyond those it was originally designed around, even in the slightly more spacious .38 S&W case.
You may very well not see any signs of your gun not "liking" your loads, right up until the instant it blows a couple chambers or lets loose at the latch.
You keep it up, it WILL catch up with you.
Interestingly, re your flashlight comment, there's a post by a longtime trainer at professional levels on another forum that basically leads off with "I Ain't Gonna Be Polite No More, I'm Just Gonna Lay It Out!"
In training several hundred people in LE this past year or so, along with past experience, he found that if you do not have that light in your hand when an immediate threat presents, you won't get it in hand in time to do anything with it. (This obviously applies, as I said, to an immediate threat, one that's unannounced, sudden, too close to use cover or withdraw.)
He found, even among experienced people with brightlight training, the sudden response of the brain to close and dynamic threatening stimuli will direct your response to the gun, not the light. Your brain won't split your motor responses in two different directions in sending your hands to a defensive tool.
Your off-side hand may be directed toward pushing off an assailant while your strong hand draws the gun, blocks a blow, moves a friend or family member out of the way, etc., but the light is not part of the response.
That means its effectiveness is limited to those occasions where you may have warning of some sort and a conscious decision to already have the light in your hand.
If the threat is too sudden, the light almost certainly won't be in your hand, and won't be a realistic factor in your defense.
And, I'm not scorning a modern .38 SPECIAL snub, from Colt, S&W, or Ruger, with a double-action design that can be fired rapidly with one hand, equipped with more visible sights, crafted of modern heat-treated steels, using a good bullet at decent velocities.
Nor do I scorn the proud possession of classic antiques. I have a 1927 I-frame Smith in .38 S&W that I've shot, but won't carry, and a British Enfield in .38 S&W with a snub barrel that I enjoy owning, but have never gotten around to shooting, and would never carry defensively unless it was absolutely all I had. Both are from eras where steel was at least heat-treated to some degree, and the Enfield is much less likely to jump its latch than your Smith, even if I were to use hotter loads, which it will never be subjected to. That gun was built for hard use, yours wasn't.
You may notice I have not pushed any specific choice of caliber, cartridge, or delivery system. I occasionally carry an Airweight S&W .38 Special five-shot snub, when things like doctor visits indicate less visibility than belt carry is desirable.
As far as the "Small Town=Small Threat Level" goes, look back at the teenage girl I mentioned earlier, shot on a lonely country road between a town of 500 inhabitants and a town of maybe 5,000 inhabitants.
I'll mention an elderly lady raped in her home in a town of less than 700 people.
And so on.
We're all playing the numbers anyway, in hoping we will never become one of the "It Happened To Me" stats. The numbers do run in our favor, but anybody who figures "it can't happen to me" is deluding themselves, and anybody who thinks there's enough reason to carry a gun for protective use has more than enough reason to carry a practical one.
I could counter your "small town-low threat" statement with this: Then why bother to carry a gun at all?
And, lest you feel I'm dumping on you unduly, imagine somebody coming on this forum and making the following post: I have this really spiffy antique .22 LR single-shot rolling block Remington, I can hit soda cans at 50 yards with it all day long, I'm gonna take it grizzly hunting 'cause it's my baby."
You'd expect nobody to get on and say "Whoa, there! You REALLY oughta re-think that." in the aftermath?
I consider it the same.
Denis