The "Yahoo" factor (humor)

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Oleg Volk:
"Mr. Oldtimer"
"Mah eye ait's so good no more..." as they pick up their twenty empties and leave the target with one ragged hole in it hanging.[/quote]
I met this man last summer.
He and his wife looked to be in their late 60’s to early 70’s.
They got out of the car and proceeded to set up at a station.
Probably took twenty minutes to put a target in place and get the rifle ready.
When the range was declared hot he put ten rounds (that’s all he shot) into a spot no bigger than a pop-top, at 100 yards. There were about five other shooters at the time. We all stopped to watch. When he was done and packing up he gave a slight grin and said something like “don’t want to get out of pratcice”. All we could say was good shooting sir, see you next trip. He waved and replied “alright.




[This message has been edited by jeffer (edited May 05, 2000).]
 
Mr.Santa Claus

Let's people shoot his guns, actually offers them and ammo just to get others started on "bad" guns.

Buys ammo for other people's kids so they can shoot longer (.270 for a ten year old sighting in his deer gun). I wonder if buying candy/ammo for other people's kids is a sign of deviancy.

Genuinely surprised when, after letting someone use his USP45, he isn't permitted to even *look* at the borrower's Lorcin. Something about not letting others handle his weapons...
 
Blind .22 Target Shooter.

Middle-aged guy with a .22 target gun. His paper targets are about 10 feet out and he's shooting 6-inch groups and occasionally missing the target entirely. Sometimes there is a gun rest involved. He never says a word to anyone. Will usually walk out of the range for 15 minutes at a time. No one knows where he goes.

I see one of these guys every time I go.
 
One of my favorite true range stories. Two young "Gansta" types shooting holes all over the target at seven yards and talking about how bad they are and nobody better mess with me, etc. These jerks are really pumped up and proud of themselves.
Into the space next to them comes an older lady. In her sixties, gray hair and looking like someones grandmother (which she is). She sets her target at 15 yards, picks up her N-frame S&W and promptly center punches the X-ring with six .44 specials.
The Gansta boys immediately shut up and stand stupidly staring at her target.
At this point the lady empties her gun, sets it on the table and returns to the range office to finish her conversation with her husband, the rangemaster. :D
I was laughing so hard I had to leave the firing line!

------------------
TFL's official "Curmudgeon Member" and damned proud of it!
 
"Ice Cream Commandos":
You've seen them. They're the kids hanging around the range wearing the 'Kill 'em all, Let God sort 'em out' t-shirts, the BDU Tigerstripe pants and the Vietnam Veteran hats that they're obviously too young to have earned. They usually loudly comment on the comparative effectiveness of the M16 vs. the AK47, while violating the Contempt of Cop statutes. When punched in the nose, they tend to fall down and bleed a lot.

"Da Duke":
He's got a cheek full of Red Man and poses a drowning hazard to insect and small reptiles. He's got a belly barely held in check by his belt, a John Deere cap on top of his flattop haircut and some great huge revolver in his paw, with which he is making terrifyingly small groups at blood-chillingly long ranges. He shoots one-handed, and talks low and slow. When questioned, he will admit to having been "In the military", but will note that he "didn't actually do much". A check of the local VFW will show that "not doin' much" is a euphemism for a Silver Star, three Purple Hearts and commendations out the ying-yang.

LawDog

[This message has been edited by LawDog (edited May 06, 2000).]
 
I was up at the range a couple years ago and ran into the cop wanna-be. A reserve officer. He was in plain clothes with his reserve badge hung on his belt. Said RESERVE on it in big letters. He had his Beretta 92 out and was trying to keep the shots on B-27 target at 7 yds. Some of them even hit it.

I was 2 stations down, shooting at 15 yds. at the time, with a 3" 629 loaded with .44 specials. The center of my target was pretty well shot out so I was shooting at the scoring numbers. (I shoot a lot.) :) He was dumbstruck that anyone could do that double action. He ask how a "civilian" could shoot so well. I suggested he burn up about two kegs of powder and try again. He didn't get it. He thought only cops could shoot.

Rick

------------------
I prefer armed combat to unarmed combat. It's easier on the knuckles.
 
there was the "Gifted Instructor". i offered to pay him to teach me to shoot like him. he spent about 30 minutes giving me sound instruction on safety and technique with my old 1911. he took my $100.00 and told me to come to his house in 6 days. when i arrived i found he had a five gallon bucket of .45 ACP ammo for me loaded up for me. i was told to leave and shoot the ammo. half way down the bucket was a black magic marker line. he said when i got to that line come back. when i came back he wathced me shoot and adjusted my technique some and commented on my progress. by the time the ammo was gone i could shoot fairly well. i took him the bucket of empty shells. we shot that afternoon and when i was leaving he pulled out another bucket of ammo. "Get yourself a loader and i will teach you to use it." he said. i have never looked back. GREAT GUY

------------------
Democracy is two wolves and a lamb voting on what is for lunch.
Liberty is a well armed lamb contesting the outcome of the vote.
Let he that hath no sword sell his garment and buy one. Luke 22-36
They all hold swords, being expert in war: every man hath his sword upon his thigh because of fear in the night. Song of Solomon 3-8
The man that can keep his head and aims carefully when the situation has gone bad and lead is flying usually wins the fight.
 
Then there's the good guy:
In my case it was the RO at Southeastern Shooting Center, the range I frequent in Hardeeville SC. A young man, former Senior Pistol Instructor at Parris Island. Competent. So very competent, that you knew just by looking at him. He's trained around 10,000 people to shoot pistols. I probably got 2 grand in free lessons from him, just because he said "You listen and try to learn." I would also watch him and laugh when the newbie comes straight from the gun shop with his 3" 44 Mag., his fist gun ever, stick a target at 25 yards, and proceed to punch out about 50 rounds, never or rarely hitting the target. He would complain to the RO about how the sights must be messed up because it's new, RO would ask to see the handgun, line up one shot, put it right between the eyes on a B-27, and diplomatically say "I don't believe there's anything wrong with that handgun, sir." I would turn away so not the newbie wouldn't see me laughing laugh.

I was sorry when this RO left to become a W VA. State Trooper.
 
I saw this one yesterday. The "Better Get Out the Band-Aids" shooter. The gun owner and his buddy are on the range. They fiddle with the gun for a while. Then one of them comes in and says that he can't get his gun to work. I get tapped to go out and see what is going on. It seems the Jennings .25 isn't working as the factory intended (or, maybe it is). As I walk into the booth I can smell the beer wafting from the pores. He explains that when he pulls the trigger nothing happens. I examine the gun, it is now unloaded. Extra credit for that. I load the gun and point it downrange at about chest level. That way if the slide comes off it won't hit me in the bridge of the nose. I pull the trigger. The sear trips but nothing happens. I remove the magazine and rack the slide. The round stays in the chamber. "Yeah, it does that," the owner says. "I just use my car key to pry it out." This on a gun with no slide lock. I put the weapon down, back away, and allow his to demonstrate his technique. The other one of them takes the bottle of CLP I brought with me and starts squeezing copious amounts into the firing pin channel.

For politeness sake I mention that our gunsmith will be in Tuesday if he would like to leave the weapon. He declines. I walk back to the shop. The two then try to get the manager to refund the range fees since they weren't able to fire a single shot. I'm thinking, they just paid for some much more valuable instruction into selecting firearms for purchase. I doubt they saw it that way, though.
 
The "I ought to be a Sales Rep" guy
He LOVES his <<insert make here>>. Asks you several times while you're shooting if you want to try his gun out. If you try to leave the range without shooting it, he'll tackle you on the way out and force you to shoot it. He really loves his gun, and just wants everyone to try it out so you'll see how really great it is.
 
Here is one of my favorites:

"The Professional."

On the left end of the range were two folks, one older and oen younger gentleman. Both were firing with deliberate slowness at the 175 yard target marks, making minute adjustments between shots. The older fellow rarely said a word, just took a shot, made an adjustment, and took two more shots.

When we called cold range, we went downrange to check targets. The older man stayed behind. I looked at the younger fellow and said, "Doesn't he want to check his target?"

The response: "Daddy don't need to check his targets. He was a sniper in Korea and Viet Nam."

A few minutes later, the proof of this statement was apparent. At 175 yards, there were three holes. One hole 1.5" high and 1" left of center. The next two bullets went into a slightly elliptical hole dead center over the bullseye. In otherwords, this guy same-holed two shots with a .270 at 175 yards.
 
I was describe several times in there. Lets see, I'm the Loner most of the time. I go out early not because there isn't anyone there right when the range opens, but so I can have the rest of the day to play. I keep to myself, unless someone talks to me. Observe the safety rules but occasionally I have a brain fart.

I am also the "The Enthusiast". That's why I have 2 ½ AR's they make me smile. I have also been gansta boy. Just cuz that's how I dress sometimes. Never do anything unsafe. Although once in a while I will shoot gansta style, but that not unsafe as much is it just stupid. (I always look around to make sure no one is really look b4 I shoot gansta style)

I favorite guy at the range is the "hilly billy." Kinda the know it all guy, kinda the loud guy all rolled up into one. Typically very friendly and unlike the the know it all loud guy, he knows most of what he is talking about and is loud because he has been shooting for a long time probably many of the early years with little or no hearing protection. Not to offend anyone, but he typically looks like trailer trash. Missing teeth optional. But most of the time the nicest guys at the range. Next to Santa Claus. Last time is name was Bill forced me and my friend to shoot his HK91 not because he was mr. Salesguy, but because we were showing genuine interest in the weapon. Also, gave good advice on why my AR wasn't working. Most people at the range are good people. The people you have to worry about are at home. That's a different thread though.


------------------
It ain't mah fault. did I do dat?
http://yellowman.virtualave.net/
 
I saw myself in there a couple of times, too! I am either the loner, or the technician, although not when I go to the range with my friends!

-Tim
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top