Depends on the Gun
I am 65 and I've shot 45ACP since I was an 18 year old recruit.
I find 45 ACP in a 1911 to have a "push" recoil which is very easy to manage.
I usually shoot 9mm in Browning HP's or a Springfield EMP.
The recoil isn't vary noticeable except for very hot rounds.
Same with 38 Super in a steel 1911(RIA),and even with Corbons there is little recoil.
Now,40-I don't like shooting it because the recoil is kind of "twsty" and it's hard to regain sight alignment fast.
Strangely,I got a Glock 20SF in 10mm and the recoil isn't at all unpleasant,though it is stout with some rounds.
I would not want to shoot it from a Glock 29.
OK,now I shot some 9mm from a Rorbaugh and it was downright painful.I can assume any little,tiny semiauto with full power 9mm is no fun.
The EMP is small,but very sturdy,and the action soaks up the recoil.
I have experienced nasty recoil from hot loaded 45 Auto Rim and ACP's in 45 revolvers-I switched to a Pachmayr grip on my S&W 22-4 because it tore up my thumb with the little Thunder Ranch grips.
My 1917 Colt Army with the walnut grips is also a little tough,but I'd never sully such a good old classic with rubber grips.I've discussed it with my thumb
.
Basically,the platform determines the felt recoil,whether we're discussing semiautos or revolvers.