Chadio -
I shouldn't HAVE to worry about my loved ones going to public places
You are correct in that it shouldn't be a worry. Unfortunately, as I've already said in a different thread today, your safety is an illusion.
I walk into a room, I look for the exits, I make a mental note of who enters and leaves. The only time I sit with my back to the main entrance is when I eat lunch with LEO friends.
On the highway, I am constantly scanning around me and keeping inventory of which cars are in which positions around me. I have a long commute in heavy traffic and I've had to suddenly switch lanes before. It helps to have some idea of what your exit is.
I'm always on the lookout for suspect behavior. When I was in India, a man was tailing my project manager (a female) and one of the female staff members we were there to train. We had become separated, but once I made eye contact and moved in their direction he reversed direction and left. What was he up to? No idea, all I care about is he went the other way.
I've had to draw a weapon in defense before, I've opened the door with a gun behind my back once, I engaged in hand-to-hand with some wannabe gang-bangers in a mall food court a few years back.
A Mall. Food Court.
There are no safe places.
I'm not against relaxation or even letting my guard down, but in environments I don't control I am not safe. I can't count how many car accidents I've avoided simply by paying attention. How many dangerous situations have I successfully defused just by not being a target? No idea, but more then a couple at least.
At some point, no amount of preparation or situational awareness will help you if things suddenly go sideways. You just have to hope your preparations and training are enough to get you through.
Bad people don't care and they never will. It doesn't take a spree killer, it just takes an individual or a handful of miscreants to create a situation that we all agree shouldn't happen. Yet it does. The sooner we come to grips with that and stop putting on rose colored glasses the better off we'll all be. Bad people would get away with less if we as a society would acknoweldge they are there and were prepared to deal with them.