Someday you're going to wake up with a tremendous headache, your mouth will be dry, your stomach will be doing flip-flops and it'll hurt just to open one eye. You'll look around and the room will be spinning, clothes all over the place. The room will smell foul, like rotten eggs and there will be smoke in the air. Your wallet will be open on the floor, and while all you cash and credit cards are intact, the cards are all maxed out and there's a stack of overdue bills on the dresser. You're not sure you even recognize the name on the letters, nor the address. You especially don't recognize the places they're from, strange names like Track of the Wolf (some kind of religious cult, maybe?), October Country (must be a travel agent), The Log Cabin Shop (who wants to buy a log cabin?). You pick up the phone and check recent calls, and all of them are to a speed dial number set to Cabela's (some kind of bar, maybe, or heaven forbid, a sporting house!).
Resistance is futile.
Resistance is futile.