handgun for the wife to use for home defense

group17 said:
Number one a gun that fits her hand and doesn't have major recoil. Start her off with a 22 to get comfortable with shooting. Then work her up to a compact 9mm.
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I agree. I started my wife with a .22 Magnum, until she was comfortable with the recoil and noise (ie. Not flinching, shutting eyes, shaking in anticipation of the bang). Then I moved her up to a 9mm compact and full size. The compact was a S&W M&P Compact 9mm. As well as the full size. It is double action and is an ergonomically well made/designed pistol. Sight acquisition was easily acquired and learned by my wife.

All in all, it was the handgun she choose. In my opinion, she shot better groups with it, then any of the other 4 compacts she tested. Total time from beginning to her final decision of the M&P was roughly 5 to 7 weeks. We put 2 days minimum at the range per week.

I suggest going to a range together (if possible), renting multiple handguns (both full size and compact) and putting a couple hundred rounds at least through the rentals until she independently decides which one she felt most comfortable with. Then attend some sort of basic pistol course or home defense course. It worked well for us. Hope this helps.

Have a good one.
 
Hi
I was thinking a very important point not commented on very much here is training. NOTE: training is not YOU and her. It is HER getting to a professional class taught by someone else. Even if it is the one hour classes that are usually done on a local shooting range once a week. Get her into someone else's training class for a bit. They vary from one hour to 5.5 days at places like Gunsite. Good training/experience is Invaluable!

My wife likes a .44 S&W 29 in .44 Mag, but only loads .44 Spcl unless in bear/moose country, we live in Alaska.

If you are looking at longguns, don't forget about all the Marlin and Winchesters in pistol calibers. The Winchesters are top eject thus ambidextrous if one of you is a lefty. So is the Browning pump. That is what we have for my wife.

So, before you buy, classes and testing different gun types and calibers.

Then get what she like.
 
I'm trying to figure out why nobody has recommemded the new Keltec PMR-30 yet. If I was going to get a pistol for my wife, who doesn't feel particularly comfortable with guns, I would seriously consider it. If 30 rounds of 22mag doesn't stop an attacker, then it's likely nothing will. Supposed to be accurate and low recoil. Yeah I would rather she use a 9mm, but if caliber intimidation is the thing, then I can't think of a better solution.
 
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Not long ago, my mom was in a similar situation, having no experience but wanting something right now for protection. So we went to a local range that has a good selection of rental guns, and tried out several options. While she didn't need much instruction to put the rounds where she wanted them to go, and could shoot anything I handed her with sufficient accuracy, her followup shots were only quick and accurate with .22 LR.

With regard to caliber, her questions were very pragmatic and to-the-point. She asked me whether my .40 S&W pistol could knock a bad guy flat with one good shot, and I replied that even a relatively heavy caliber pretty much just pokes holes, that whether the bullet is effective depends on where it hits the potentially moving target, and that she may need to shoot the bad guy several times to stop him, even if each shot would eventually prove to be lethal. Then she asked me whether .22 LR can stop or kill, and I told her that yes it can, depending on where the bullets hit, and that while it does less damage on each shot, you (meaning her specifically, based on her shooting that day) can shoot the bad guy faster with it. That's all it took for her to decide on .22 LR, and she loves her 10-shot S&W 617 because she shoots it so well and did so right from the start.

I'm just giving you an anecdote from my own experience (exactly what you asked for ;)). Your wife may have different preferences or difficulties, as everybody is different. I tried everything I could including light .38 Special target loads out of heavy revolvers, but my mom, beginner that she is, could always shoot .22 LR better. Apparently she's sensitive to recoil but not trigger pull weight--I asked her about the latter and she had no idea what I was talking about (i.e. didn't notice), even when she went straight from a single-action auto to a double-action revolver. The opposite may be true for others, however, as I've seen plenty of big guys who can shoot big calibers with no difficulty whine incessantly about trigger pull weight. ;)

So the bottom line is to find out how your wife handles various weapons and calibers, and then to let her decide--with practical guidance from you when necessary--what suits her best.
 
My wife chose my 2 1/2" S&W 66 for her home defense and carry gun. She uses 38 Special ammo in it instead of a magnum load. You may wish to try her on something similar. If a shotgun is her choice I would recommend a 20 gauge over the 410. If the recoil of the 20 bothers her too much a 410 will have to do (use buckshot or slugs in the 410).
 
Be happy she has interest in guns #1 !!!!

A good used S & W revolver in .38 special would be priced right, and the recoil would not be too bad. Yes a .44 mag, .357 mag, and a big shot gun might all be better man stoppers, but if she isn't liking the idea of big recoil, a .38 has stopped many a bad guy.
 
"...she loves her 10-shot S&W 617 because she shoots it so well and did so right from the start."

Interesting... That .22 weighs 41 oz. unloaded!... Must be about the softest-shooting handgun in production... Thanks for telling that...
 
Mine chose a Glock 23. She likes the fact there are no levers, safeties, hammers, etc to fool with. She can grab the gun in total darkness and just pull the trigger to make it work. Though I did put the tritium sights on it for that. And I have a lot of guns she could chose from. But she liked the Glock. Its stupidly simple to operate.
 
My advice...

Forget about a shotgun or rifle.

Yes, long-guns are more effective at stopping aggressive humans than handguns, but the handgun is the weapon that you can have with you all the time.
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"can have with you" being the operative phrase. I do agree though, if she's will to have the gun on her throughout he day, a handgun makes perfect sense. I've got a handgun at my side whenever it's legal to have it. It's also easier to keep one locked up, if so desired.

But if it is going to sit on a high shelf someplace, may as well be something easier to shoot and more potent, like a 20 gauge pump or M1 carbine.
 
For my Wife

As usual, a lot of very good, well thought out solutions here.
When I started dating my wife, she owned a Smith .357 and had some basic knowlege of how to use it. But when we started shooting together, I saw that the gun was just a little too much for her, although she would not admit it. So the next time we went out shooting, I gave her one of my old Model
10's to try out, and she just loved it! Now it is HER old model 10. While she does better with her 686, she still prefers to shoot the .38.
As far as training goes, getting someone else to train your wife is probably a very good idea!:p. Although I am not a certified instructer, I did shoot competition for over a decade, and am a certified Range Officer, so I feel that I am at least adequate to give basic instruction in the use of firearms. Notice, I said "adequate", and that only applies to my family and close friends.
Anyway, the things that she would put up with from a qualified stranger did not fly between her and myself:(. Although I was able to instill the basics of handling, finger off the trigger until time to shoot, using the front sight, etc., there was A LOT OF HER BITC...., umm. errr, bickering, yeah, that's it, bickering;), about how I acted like she was dumb, or something. Anyway, take that for what it is worth.
Willy
 
With the women in my life making the final decisions, I provided opportunities for them to fire several different calibers and types of handguns as well as smaller gauge shotguns. The shotguns were ruled out immediately. Too unwieldy. They both felt comfortable with .38 spl revolvers and wadcutters. very little recoil. Wife uses either a 3 inch barrel model 36 which I think is perfect. She is a great shot with that or either a model 37 smith with bobbed hammer for CCW. My mother did well with a stainless model 36. She, too, was very accurate. We have since had to remove the pistol from her home due to her present state of mind. Wife feels very confident with revolvers because; fits her hand, easy to point and shoot, no racking the slide for weak hands, easy accessibility. YMMV
 
CWKahrFan said:
"...she loves her 10-shot S&W 617 because she shoots it so well and did so right from the start."

Interesting... That .22 weighs 41 oz. unloaded!... Must be about the softest-shooting handgun in production... Thanks for telling that...
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My point was that people should stay within their current limitations when choosing a handgun for self-defense--if that means dropping down to .22 LR in a heavy revolver, then so be it. Based on what I've seen, I bet that most people would have taken a look at the decent groups that my mom had shot with my M&P40 (slow fire) and concluded that it was an acceptable match for her, even though she couldn't fire it fast enough (with accuracy) for defensive purposes (in my opinion).

Another point was that she evidently could handle the heavy DA trigger with no issues, but that is not true for everybody, which emphasizes the importance of experimentation at the range and suggests what to experiment with. One thing that I should add is that not all ranges allow rapid fire, and I think that it is important for defensive purposes to find out how well a person can fire a string of shots. It always makes me wonder, for example, whenever I see somebody shooting at bad guy silhouettes adjust their grip after every single shot--dude, get a gun that actually fits you, or shoot something lighter until you get better (which may require some instruction).
 
Handgun newb, but I can offer this advice FWIW because I just went through the same exercise with my wife...

Take her to a range where she can rent a few different weapons.
My wife had no problem with our CZ-75B, so I thought a J-frame .38 special would be just the ticket for concealed carry, safety and reliability.

Wrong... she's very accurate with a 9mm semi-auto, but for some reason, could not get the wheelgun on target. Perhaps it could have been resolved with training and practice, but why try to "force" a gun that she wasn't comfortable with. I explained to her that a semi-auto was fine, but she was going to have to train with it more...and she was all for it. Me, I really liked the 642 we tried...

The 3-day wait is over tomorrow and I'm picking up her new LC9. The guys at the LGS hadn't handled or fired one yet, so we put a few rounds into the "tube" at the shop. Trigger pull is long (which I like for safety reasons), but releases very cleanly. Thumbs up from all of us...

Bottom line is, let her decide. What you think would be the perfect choice, may not be...

Good luck!
 
Been thinking about getting a Beretta Cheetah for my wife. She refuses to shoot anything more powerful than a 380. I figure if I can get her accustomed to the Cheetah's somewhat larger frame now, she may be less intimidated/more willing to practice with a more powerful handgun later.
 
A very significant factor is how the gun fits in the hand. The distance between the backstrap and the trigger is critical to whether or not you can acquire target quickly between shots. That's one of the reasons why critical to try before you buy, as many pistols/revolvers as possible.

Recoil is a factor that has to be considered as well. Larger frame guns will recoil less or will feel like they have less recoil as will smaller calibers. If she test fires a Ruger P89 (or whatever it's called these days) in 9mm, the recoil will be pretty minimal.

Learning to shoot can be best done with a small .22 caliber revolver. If she learns to shoot with a gun which is too large, she will likely learn bad habits at best and will likely hate to shoot at worst.

www.corneredcat.com is a great resource for her to read. I suspect that she'd find it very useful.

My wife loves to shoot. She did it her way, though, and while she isn't as obsessed about it as I am, she still likes to shoot and carries a .45 ACP pistol.

--Wag--
 
Self defense issues, advice...

For a spouse or female with no or few handgun-marksmanship skills, I'd say a good firearm to start with would be a simple DA only .38spl or .357magnum stainless steel revolver. If she has the hand strength & can safely load-unload, fire a DA only revolver, I'd look for a good used police model S&W 64 .38spl a Ruger SP101 .357magnum DA only snub or a larger S&W L frame 686+ .357magnum. She can train or practice with light .38spl semi-wad cutters or FMJ loads then use +P or +P+ rounds for home defense.
The stainless models are easy to clean & service. You could also add a lasergrip to assist in target training or protection use; www.Crimsontrace.com .
I suggest a DA only type revolver to avoid the false claims of "cocking a hammer" or firing by accident in a critical incident. Many US police agencies have issued DA only type revolvers & pistols for years for these reasons.

I'd avoid any rifles or shotguns too. Your wife may need to fire the revolver one handed or use her free hand to open doors dial-use phones hold a flashlight etc. Break-ins & attacks are fast, dynamic events. Keep things simple for now until she can build her skill sets.
Clyde
ps; I'd also suggest she get formal tactics-weapons training and to know the state or local use of force & gun laws.
www.NRA.org www.Gunvideo.com www.Paladin-Press.com
 
My mother has mobility issues and until recently, lived in a very rural area of Arkansas. My father purchased her a Judge and loads it with Winchester PDX Personal-Defense.

The Judge, works like a charm for its intended use of in-home personal protection. Good, reliable "House-Gun" guaranteed to make a lot of noise and fill a room with projectiles to the front of the shooter; every time the trigger is pulled, easily controllable and handy. I personally wouldnt use one, but for what it is...it works for her. She shoots it well.
 
Just my 2 cents. DA revolver in 38spl (can be a 357 mag,) start out with nice meak 38 special wadcutters. First impressions go a long way, don't try to impress her with a flaming 357 mag load. Go for gun with smaller grips (thin.) Anyone can master grips that fit or are to small, but to big is a real problem. Buy Mike Conti's book and teach point shooting. Police with years of range experience do better in actual shootings when taught point shooting. The gun will probably be used with one hand as the other hand will be holding a phone, flashlight, turning on lights, or opening a door, (one of the reasons shotguns are difficult for home defense + retention.) Don't buy a gun and have a bunch of stuff hanging off it, (more to learn and with a light or laser your teaching someone to search with the muzzle.) One of the other post mentions woman at the range leaning toward autos. Thats probably true for his students but they want to be there and have some interest in guns. My wife has to be dragged to the range and has no interest in shooting. I keep it simple with a DA wheel gun. Good luck.
 
ClydeFrog said:
She can train or practice with light .38spl semi-wad cutters or FMJ loads then use +P or +P+ rounds for home defense.
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Only if she shoots the +P or +P+ rounds just as well, I would think. While it's no big deal for some, it may be for a beginner, possibly.
 
M's post, Steve Martin...

M's remarks are true but if a new handgun shooter or CCW license holder trains with a "light" .38spl round they may have the skills to use a more powerful +P or +P+ load later on. There are non +P rated self defense rounds but they would be limited compared to a +P or .357magnum JHP.

In the words of Steve Martin; "You can't have everything. Where would you put it?"

;)
 
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