Perhaps we should distinguish among: mental habits, physical habits, preferences, and training. Of this mix, mental habits appear to be the most important. Mental habits tend to reinforce emotional preferences; and, together, the two guide physical behavior. A large part of the problem with personal safety is that good, decent people don’t, always, make the right moves to protect themselves – especially in advance – and, consequently, tend to set themselves up and walk into truly dangerous situations that the brain’s elementary limbic system, otherwise, ‘screams’ to avoid! Frankly, in my old age, if there’s one lesson the years have taught me, it’s that YOUR PERSONAL HABITS ARE WHAT, REALLY, KEEP YOU SAFE.
I have a friend who has managed to survive with a longstanding mob contract on his life. (There have been several attempts; and, no, the contractors weren’t sissies. This ain’t TV; and, ‘Don Cojones’ doesn’t always win.) He’s a pretty smart guy; and I’ve learned a lot from hanging around with him. I’d have to say that he has taught me some of the best, ‘survival habits’ I have, ever, seen. He tends to avoid crowds. (Habit) You can’t get close to him; (Habit) inside 12’ he’ll start to, ‘gauge you’ with his eyes. (Habit) He usually doesn’t talk to people by facing them squarely; instead he often moves off, a little, to one side. (Habit) If someone walks up behind him, he’ll quickly step aside to glance over his shoulder and take a look. (Habit) Whenever he walks through a doorway, he’ll pause and immediately look both ways, then, he’ll take a few steps and stop to look, again. (Habit) I’ve never seen him get into a car without checking out the other vehicles, nearby. (Habit) Once in, he locks the doors and starts the engine immediately. (Habit) I kidded him, once, about locking the doors; (Like that’s going to do any good!) I’ll never forget his reply; ‘I want my wife to understand that it wasn’t a suicide.’ Wow!
He carries two guns and, sometimes, two knives. (Habit) His attitude amazes me; he has told me that he doesn’t really worry about dying. (Habitual Attitude) (We, all, do it anyway – right!) I think this guy would be more than happy to die: today, tonight, or tomorrow, as long as he gets to do it on his own terms. (Habitual Attitude) I, once, heard him joke; ‘If I’ve got to clear out of here suddenly, then, someone else is going to carry my bags to Hell for me!’ (Again, Habitual Attitude)
If I had to travel through a rough neighborhood, he is the person I’d want to go with me. I don’t think this guy is that much brighter than a lot of other people; he, simply, pays attention better. I know he’s not necessarily any tougher, too; but, he is a whole lot more experienced! The mistakes that many other people would fumble themselves into, or not even see coming don’t occur with him. The other thing I like about this guy is that he’s, almost instinctively, loyal to his friends; and this causes other people (like me) to want to associate with him. The last time we went out together he, rather wryly, remarked; ‘Most killers (attackers) are cowards; they need to feel, ‘an edge’; or they won’t make that final move!’ (By, ‘final move’ I believe he meant, ‘commence an attack’.)
In my own, ‘old age’ I have come to believe that many of us who carry guns around all day long aren’t, really, prepared to use them, ‘properly’. If you (or anyone else) are typical, then, I tend to believe that your carry piece is more of a, ‘security blanket’ than a deadly weapon. The next time you’re confronted, don’t divert your eyes! Why? Because; (at risk of waxing poetic) ‘The eyes are the mirror of the soul.’ The other guy’s eyes will, often, be your first indication of what is about to happen. The statement; ‘What time is it?’ is, to my mind, one of the most dangerous remarks in the world! (No, not in a conference room; but, certainly, from a stranger on the street.) Anytime a stranger tries to: get too close to you, divert your eyes, or occupy your hands, YOU HAVE A PROBLEM. It may be, either, minor or major; but it’s a problem – nonetheless.
For the record, here are some of the right answers to: (Q.) 'Hey, buddy, what time is it?' (ANS.) 'I don't know.' or (ANS.) 'About 'X' o'clock.' (Q) 'You're wearing a watch, aren't you?' (ANS.) 'It doesn’t work.' (Q.) 'Hey, pal, got a match?' (ANS.) 'Sorry, No!' If you feel the situation warrants it, never hesitate to use expressions like; 'Stop, right there!' or my own perennial favorites; 'That's it; I WILL shoot you!' or 'Run away, NOW!'
Please remember that your sidearm AND your training are NOT, ‘security blankets’. Your HABITS are your real guardian angel; and the next time your elemental limbic system kicks in, move like the aboriginal predator that all men, once, were. Remember; ‘If you aren’t looking for it, you won’t see it!’
