please stay on point. I don't need to know about the hardest semi to rack!!!
Sorry Doc. My bad.
but, you did say
As aways, I'd appreciate "ALL" suggestions from the Forum.
I absolutely agree that if it is a hammer gun cock the hammer first. Another trick to ease the force needed is to rack the slide on an empty magazine, locking it back.
Depending on the gun, the pressure of top round against the slide can make a difference.
Small pocket guns, especially blow backs can be very difficult to rack, between the stiff springs and small gripping area its tough.
Its tough to honestly say, because I don't have much trouble with any of them, and don't really know how much trouble you and you wife would have with A or B or Z. Plus your requirements for defensive power and more capacity than a revolver. Probably one of the wondernines but they all seem about the same to me, so I can't really recommend one over the other.
I'm fine with a full size 1911A1, and my mother, at 4'10 (and a half!) who wore a size 3.5 ring could manage it, though it was never her favorite.
So, something big enough to get a decent grip on the slide. "Compact" models may be ok for you, pocket guns will be difficult. Probably 9mm for capacity, and adequate power. Beyond that, I think pretty much a matter of how you do it. You need to overcome a spring in the 15-20lb range (generally).
If the gun has a hammer, cock it first
rack the slide back gun empty, so it locks
try just holding the slide and pushing the grip. Works better for some people than trying to hold the grip and pull back the slide
you can use the edge of a table (or a lot of other things) to push the slide against (empty gun) to get it locked back.
Maybe using your hands opposite of a firing grip to get the slide locked back.
Gripping the slide from the top using the whole hand vs from the rear..
Go to a shop, or the range with semi auto shooters, handle some different guns, see what kind of thing you can manage, how much effort is too much, what is just right, what is manageable "if you have to".
IF you find something that feels ok, then look at the other features it has and whether they turn you on, or off. I like a semi auto with a safety, one that is NOT on the trigger. I'm ok with a decocker. I prefer a hammer, but that's just me.