Delicate situation--advice welcome.
- Thread starter Don Gwinn
- Start date
You should have told that if her father had been smart enough to have a to have a CHL and been legally carrying, he might still be alive!
I always ask these people simple questions that even their tiny brains can understand;
" If you hate guns how in the world do you protect your family?"
"If bad guys with knives break into your house does your wife say I'm calling 911?"
"If you're at the park and some gang bangers decide they want to take your wife and daughters, what are you gonna do, put some kung fu on em or run to your car and call 911?"
You have to ask them questions that get thru to their irrational, emotionally driven brain.
I always ask these people simple questions that even their tiny brains can understand;
" If you hate guns how in the world do you protect your family?"
"If bad guys with knives break into your house does your wife say I'm calling 911?"
"If you're at the park and some gang bangers decide they want to take your wife and daughters, what are you gonna do, put some kung fu on em or run to your car and call 911?"
You have to ask them questions that get thru to their irrational, emotionally driven brain.
Jeff Thomas
New member
Don, you sound like a very decent and caring person. Don't let the nutcases get you down.
Frankly, people like your resident actually help our cause, IMHO. Their illogic is obvious to most people with a brain. Perhaps if she gets her medication adjusted you two can have a real conversation.
Really ... don't waste time or emotion on the nutcases. It is a waste of your logic and intellect ... have logical conversations re: the RKBA with logical people. It is more pleasant for you, and in the long run, more profitable for our cause.
Take care. Regards from AZ
Frankly, people like your resident actually help our cause, IMHO. Their illogic is obvious to most people with a brain. Perhaps if she gets her medication adjusted you two can have a real conversation.
Really ... don't waste time or emotion on the nutcases. It is a waste of your logic and intellect ... have logical conversations re: the RKBA with logical people. It is more pleasant for you, and in the long run, more profitable for our cause.
Take care. Regards from AZ
Don,
If I recall from my lurking, you are a Resident Assistant at your dorm. Back XX years ago when I took a swing at that, we were a combination of mother hen, security guard, dorm admin, big brother and confessor. (In no particular order.) I suspect the guidance counselor type duties have increased over the years.
Tough dichotomy. On the one hand, she was / is wrong, and said something extremely stupid. On the other hand, she was not going to you to learn more about the subject. She was a resident going to you to (I think) to feel better about herself.
Not that I take stock in that sort of thing, but it is a part of the RA game.
If it comes up, apologize for the laughter, but not your position. Otherwise, she’ll find something else to annoy you with in a few weeks.
Marty
If I recall from my lurking, you are a Resident Assistant at your dorm. Back XX years ago when I took a swing at that, we were a combination of mother hen, security guard, dorm admin, big brother and confessor. (In no particular order.) I suspect the guidance counselor type duties have increased over the years.
Tough dichotomy. On the one hand, she was / is wrong, and said something extremely stupid. On the other hand, she was not going to you to learn more about the subject. She was a resident going to you to (I think) to feel better about herself.
Not that I take stock in that sort of thing, but it is a part of the RA game.
If it comes up, apologize for the laughter, but not your position. Otherwise, she’ll find something else to annoy you with in a few weeks.
Marty
My father was robbed at gunpoint in his own backyard -- this was in a state that required a purchase permit for each handgun bought and before the permit was issued, the applicant had to bring in two references in person to the local police station so that the person's character could be determined.
Under these conditions, I felt fairly certain that the person who robbed my father had obtained the gun through illegal channels -- meaning there were already laws in place to stop this but those laws were not enforced!
I didn't go around calling for more gun laws to be passed. I concluded that if they can't enforce the current laws, then how are they going to enforce additional laws.
Fortunately, my father wasn't hurt. The amount of money taken was minimual and this event prompted me to purchase my first firearm for self defense purposes (I had just turned 21 and was of legal age to purchase a handgun). If it wasn't for this happening, I might not have developed an interest in firearms.
Of course, if my father was injuried or killed, I might have gone the other way.
Moral of the story ... some people will always be "pro" gun while others will always be "anti" gun with a majority of the people being someplace in the middle depending on which side gets to them first, and how.
Share what you know, learn what you don't -- FUD
[This message has been edited by FUD (edited May 03, 2000).]
Under these conditions, I felt fairly certain that the person who robbed my father had obtained the gun through illegal channels -- meaning there were already laws in place to stop this but those laws were not enforced!
I didn't go around calling for more gun laws to be passed. I concluded that if they can't enforce the current laws, then how are they going to enforce additional laws.
Fortunately, my father wasn't hurt. The amount of money taken was minimual and this event prompted me to purchase my first firearm for self defense purposes (I had just turned 21 and was of legal age to purchase a handgun). If it wasn't for this happening, I might not have developed an interest in firearms.
Of course, if my father was injuried or killed, I might have gone the other way.
Moral of the story ... some people will always be "pro" gun while others will always be "anti" gun with a majority of the people being someplace in the middle depending on which side gets to them first, and how.
Share what you know, learn what you don't -- FUD
[This message has been edited by FUD (edited May 03, 2000).]
Don,
Perhaps you are on to something about being there to talk to her about what happened to her father. She may want to talk about it. You may want to wait until a little time has passed (no more than a week), and when you have a chance to speak with her alone, ask how her father is doing, and if she'd like to talk about what happened to him you're available.
You are under no obligation to take any crap from her. The best response if she attacks you is, "I didn't rob your father." It may take some repeating.
About the laughing... don't apologize. I would've laughed too.
Perhaps you are on to something about being there to talk to her about what happened to her father. She may want to talk about it. You may want to wait until a little time has passed (no more than a week), and when you have a chance to speak with her alone, ask how her father is doing, and if she'd like to talk about what happened to him you're available.
You are under no obligation to take any crap from her. The best response if she attacks you is, "I didn't rob your father." It may take some repeating.
About the laughing... don't apologize. I would've laughed too.
Libertarian
New member
Don, job or not, there are times when you will be the wrong person to discuss some particular issue with one of your residents. It looks like this is one of them. If you feel strongly that she needs an ear or a shoulder, perhaps you could get another RA to talk with her?
Good luck.
Good luck.
MBG, Mikul, Libertarian, you've hit on my real point of concern here. She's a resident and I'm an RA, and although I'm not obligated to stand and be insulted, I AM supposed to be available to talk to her if something crappy happens in her life. MBG is exactly right. I put Security guard/Janitor/Guidance Counselor down on forms that ask about work experience.
I have a friend who's pretty neutral about firearms but otherwise similar to me in temperament, so I think I'm going to have him talk to her. I just have to figure out a way to keep her from thinking I'm spreading her problem around campus by doing so. Sorry I brought this to TFL, but I don't know anybody here who would see a problem with what she said, really, so I'm not interested in discussing it with them. Now must go forth and finish paper.
Oh, and Puddle Pirate, I wish I had a resident like you to shoot with too! Closest I have to that is another RA who isn't afraid to shoot but NEVER has time. But I'll be out of here and back among the normal population soon.
I have a friend who's pretty neutral about firearms but otherwise similar to me in temperament, so I think I'm going to have him talk to her. I just have to figure out a way to keep her from thinking I'm spreading her problem around campus by doing so. Sorry I brought this to TFL, but I don't know anybody here who would see a problem with what she said, really, so I'm not interested in discussing it with them. Now must go forth and finish paper.
Oh, and Puddle Pirate, I wish I had a resident like you to shoot with too! Closest I have to that is another RA who isn't afraid to shoot but NEVER has time. But I'll be out of here and back among the normal population soon.
As much as I like John K's idea, tragically, I don't think it could happen. People as virulent as your resident are completely impossible to reason with because emotion controls their every thought and action; not logic or sense. Sad, but true. You're really in a lose-lose scenario with this woman, and I feel bad for you.
I believe this time-honored addage applies to your situation:
"Never try to teach a pig to sing; It wastes your time and annoys the pig."
Sorry, I just had to lighten this up a bit! Good Luck Gwinny; I've been there.
Take Care- Dakotan
I believe this time-honored addage applies to your situation:
"Never try to teach a pig to sing; It wastes your time and annoys the pig."
Sorry, I just had to lighten this up a bit! Good Luck Gwinny; I've been there.
Take Care- Dakotan
Most antis are prepared for pro-gun talk. I usually do the opposite and take a anti-helpless approach.
You know they are thinking logicly when they start agreeing that unarmed victims are at the mercy of criminals whether they use guns, knives, tire iron, or starter fluid and BIC lighter. Then it time to hit them with pro-gun talk that is supported by their own logic.
Good Luck,
Shok
You know they are thinking logicly when they start agreeing that unarmed victims are at the mercy of criminals whether they use guns, knives, tire iron, or starter fluid and BIC lighter. Then it time to hit them with pro-gun talk that is supported by their own logic.
Good Luck,
Shok
Jon, I'm not bothering with that. Next Sunday I graduate and I'm out of here. Not looking back, either.
There was never a chance to invite her to go shooting--she beleives she's too irresponsible to use a gun. I'm not making that up, that was one of her reasons for banning guns for the rest of us. And her dad lives in Texas.
There was never a chance to invite her to go shooting--she beleives she's too irresponsible to use a gun. I'm not making that up, that was one of her reasons for banning guns for the rest of us. And her dad lives in Texas.