Best Choices for Pokemon defense

G

George Hill

Staff Alumnus
We have talked about defense tools for Bears, Tigers, Thugs, Rapists, Reno, Rosie, and Roger Ebert... (Sorry I was on a RRRRRoll)
Now its time to talk about the serious threats... Assaults abound all over the country. Attacks from out of no where...
POKEMON!
The mear WORD strikes TERROR in the heart of fearful parents everywhere.
Brothers and Sisters... What can we do?

Looking at the available arsenals... There is only one gun that I see as fitting for mowing down waves of these "Pocket Monsters":
The M-41A Pulse Rifle, shooting its explosive armour piercing caseless 10mm round. It went up against Xenomorphs in the movie ALIENS...

Any other suggestions?

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"A fear of weapons is a sign of retarded sexual and emotional maturity." - Sigmund Freud
We, the people, are tired of being taxed, penalized, supervised, harassed,
and subjugated by a federal government which exceeds the powers
enumerated in the U.S. Constitution.




[This message has been edited by George Hill (edited December 13, 1999).]
 
The first rule of defense is "Avoid the Threat". This is what I practice, and I've had no Pokemon encounters to date.

But, when something absolutely, positively needs to be obliterated beyond any levels of sanity, I reach for the classic 12 gauge, preferably loaded with 3" magnum loads of bad puns.
 
Pokemons I have not had any trouble with. Now Furbys,(sp) My kids found that a .223 round from a mini-14 works very well.
Stay safe and watch you six.
John
 
Well, my 8 year old tells me they have this whipped at school, to his chagrin - they have a no-tolerance Pokemon policy. You bring a Pokemon to school, and ... you're busted. I'm not sure about jail time, but I gather they really throw the book at you.

Now, how this differs from trading baseball cards, I just don't know ... ? ;)
 
easy..

Buy them 12 inch GI-Joe and Ultimate Soldier action Figures instead. ;)

This way YOUR joe team can blast pokemon, pikachu and other video game denizens to imaginary heck.

I'd recommend Ultimate Soldier's scale 50 cal M2 for this purpose.

But if rosie o'donnel showed up as a radioactive zombie with mutant bikers trying to sell me pikachus door to door well... I think I'd skip the anchovie pizza and ice cream before bed.. then answer the door with a remmington 870 with a 20 inch deer barrel with imp cyl. and 3 inch #4 buckshot and a 3 shot magazine extension. Or an AK.

Dr.Rob
 
The M-41A Pulse Rifle is a fine weapon, but I think that more is needed to take care of the Pokemon threat. What about the smart guns used by Drake and Vasquez? Or mabey the incinerators? They ought to do the trick nicely.

Watch your fire and check your targets. (Damn, what a movie!)

TJ
 
Pikachu???

For the occasional Pokemon threat, how about plinkachu with a .22?

If they bombard the individual like a gang of rabid chinchillas, then, by all means, lay down a surpressing fire and frag 'em.

Otherwise, nuke 'em from orbit . . . it's the only way to be sure.

:)
 
First, I would set up 4 remote sentries, one on each corner, for the "They must be wall-to-wall in there." situations. Increase the output of the phased plasma to 10kW. It would have a 30mm over/under grenade launcher and, as with Ripley's choice, an M16 framed flamethrower.

The upgrade in power output would be to overcome any electrical emissions from critters like Pikachu. For the organic attack targets like the Bulbasar, I would flame him.

- Ron V.

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Of Course a DL-44 Blaster from Blastech would work nice... (Star Wars) Especially of your using the over powered power packs like what Han uses to increas the output...

------------------
"A fear of weapons is a sign of retarded sexual and emotional maturity." - Sigmund Freud
We, the people, are tired of being taxed, penalized, supervised, harassed,
and subjugated by a federal government which exceeds the powers
enumerated in the U.S. Constitution.
 
Now that I think about it, I saw a great little Chucky doll complete with bloody kitchen knife. Hmmm, a supernatural psychotic killer developed to create fear in moviegoers vs. a little Japanese pocket monster developed for profit.
As I heard on Howard Stern, "The Pokemon movie is Japan's revenge for WWII."
 
Sometimes, a good defense is a good offense. Fight fire with fire. I recommend unleashing your Mew Two on Nintendo headquarters.

It's Blues' Clues that fear....
 
Gentlemen. Fine choices. Especialy the M41A and smartguns. But those rounds and shells are stictly LE Only.

I recomend The German MG3, the updated MG42.
Low recoil, vurtualy jam-free, sustained fire. Ammunition can be had at any fine sporting goods store. Alternate your belt with Horady TAP Urban and NATO FMJ. You see, some POKEMONS are armoured, some are soft bodied. Oh, and mount a pump 12 under the barrel housing in case they get in too close.
 
The Rock.

If the Great One is not availible, then a GE minigun and 2 million rounds will do.

The Rock

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The Rock says..
 
Jeez... Talk about overkill. I'm under the assumption that the things are little. My right boot would seem to be just as effective as an M249, B1B, Iowa class Battleship, Aegis cruiser, OICW, F-117, M2HB, GAU-8A Avenger, FIM-92, M1 Abrams, and an ICBM all put together. Maybe not as fun, but just as effective. The most I'd expend on taking out one of these things would be whatever the going rate is on Bic disposable lighters.
 
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