Actual letter to the editor--stupidity must be shared.

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Don Gwinn

Staff Emeritus
An actual letter to the Editor in my local paper (The State Journal Register, Springfield, IL) and the St. Louis Post Dispatch:

"'Chicken Run' Shows Feathered Friends In More of a Human Light"

I can't imagine how anyone can chew on a drumstick again after watching the animated move (sic) "Chicken Run," which opened recently to great critical acclaim. (The 1995 screening of "Babe," the talking pig, led a number of people to drop pork from their diet.) (sic)
"Chicken Run" is a delightful British film that recounts the story of a group of brave hens plotting to escape from a factory farm. The story is both poignant and funny, and the characters quickly earn our empathy.(sic)
I was impressed how (sic) these animals that we view as food share our quest for life and liberty as well as most of our feelings of joy, affection, frustration, sadness and pain.
Thankfully, my local supermarket carries a selection of of delicious "mock chicken" foods, which, unlike dead chicken flesh, are free of saturated fat, cholesterol, and salmonella. I look forward to exploring the many cruelty-free, healthful dietary options that are available.

Joan Browning, West County."

Now, I hate to be judgmental (you know me) so I'm just going to make an observation. This person thought this letter was so good and so important that she mailed it to two different city newspapers over 100 miles apart. THIS is what she wanted people who lived far away to know about her. What sort of stupid thoughts must she be too ashamed to share?
 
"What sort of stupid thoughts must she be too
ashamed to share?"

That's a classic!!!!!!!

Excuse me, I've suddenly got this craving for Fried Chicken. Let's see, Popeyes or KFC?
Decisions, decisions.............
 
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>What sort of stupid thoughts must she be too ashamed to share?[/quote]

And aren't you glad we weren't subjected to them? :D

Here are some kinder, gentler ways to call someone stupid:
Not the sharpest knife in the drawer.
A few clowns short of a circus.
A few fries short of a Happy Meal.
A few beers short of a six-pack.
Dumber than a box of hair.
A few peas short of a casserole.
One Fruit Loop shy of a full bowl.
Body by Fischer - Brains by Mattel.
Warning: Objects in mirror are dumber than they appear.
Couldn't pour water out of a boot with instructions on the heel.
He fell out of the stupid tree and hit every branch on the way down.
An intellect rivaled only by that of garden tools.
The wheel's spinning, but the hamster's dead.

pax

"The trouble is that the stupid people --who constitute the grand overwhelming majority of this and all other nations -- do believe and are moulded and convinced by what they get out of a newspaper." -- Mark Twain
 
Heeellllooo!
Joan.
It's a MOVIE!
It's NOT REAL!
Chickens are stupid animals that can't think!
Oh, sorry, you must be a chicken.

I didn't know they could write! :)

Isn't it a shame that her last name is "Browning". :(
 
Yep, Seronac, just a movie. And an animated one to boot.
Perhaps she would want to kill all the coyotes after seeing the Road Runner cartoons.

[This message has been edited by Herodotus (edited July 12, 2000).]

[This message has been edited by Herodotus (edited July 12, 2000).]
 
Sounds like the Clue-Bat needs to come out again.

"Cruelty-free, healthful dietary options???" I can only imagine the tortured screams of all those innocent soybeans...

Later,
Chris

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"TV what do I see, tell me who to believe, what's the use of autonomy when a button does it all??" - Incubus, Idiot Box
 
This stops being funny when you realize that people who think like her have more politcal clout than we do, and the entire politcal imagery business is designed to pander to her and her friends.

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ALARM! ALARM! CIVILIZATION IS IN PERIL! THE BARBARIANS HAVE TAKEN THE GATES!
 
Well, at least the editors at the Post-Dispatch had the restraint to let the letter speak for itself. The editors at the SJR couldn't resist responding, in italics:

Of course, the chickens in "Chicken Run" are also free of cholesterol and saturated fat, as they are fictional cartoon characters molded out of clay."
:rolleyes:

Yes, the sad part is that Mrs. Browning was SERIOUS.
 
As proof of the stupidity of chickens, you need only point out that one chicken was known to have lived for several months after having his head chopped off.

Only died because got his little esophogous plugged with grain and they couldn't remove it. True Story.
 
Eat more beef or start thinking like Ms. Browning!
Oh yeah. You got to be kidding. I can understand the letter if she is a child but an adult?
Insects will rule this planet.
...just shoot up in here amoungest us,one of us just gots to have some relief!
 
This woman is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot.

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"Freedom is that instant between when someone tells you to do something and when you decide how to respond."
-Dr. Jeffrey Borenstein

"Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter."
-Martin Luther King Jr.
 
HAAAAAAAAAAHAAAAAAAHAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!
Sorry, can't stop loud, bellowing laughter long enough to post an opinion.
AAAAAAAAAHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Of course, the chickens in "Chicken Run" are also free of cholesterol and saturated fat, as they are fictional cartoon characters molded out of clay.[/quote]
BWWAAAAAAHAAAAAAHAAAAA!!!!
Don, you have no idea what a cr@ppy day I just had. Thanks for making me smile for the first time in about twelve hours!!!!!!
 
Remember a post from the other day about giving APES the same status as humans??????

Sounds like this woman has one of them in her (very near) ancestry. She'd best be glad that being stupid isn't a crime.
 
This exact same letter was posted in my local paper The News Tribune in Tacoma, WA. The "author" was from Vashon Island, an island between Tacoma and Seattle. Only the name and location of the sender was different.

Apparently some animal rights group sent this same letter to many papers using the name of a local member.
 
Well. For the first time in my adult life, I was left utterly speechless.

You know the phrase, "How stupid can you get?" In Joan's case, it's "How stupid do you want me to be?"

And as Munro noted, this twit's vote is just as valid as any of ours. Keee-rist. :rolleyes:
 
Get me this person's address! Now I know where to send all those jackrabbits I pop holes in on the weekends. :-)
 
WAITER!!!

MY CHICKEN TASTES LIKE MODELING CLAY!


On a serious note, Boulder, Colorado, today voted into effect a law that makes humans "guardians" of their pets, responsible for the pet in much the same way that the adult is responsible for a child.

Just remember, this is the SAME city that has totally and completely F***** UP the JonBenet Ramsey murder investigation.

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Beware the man with the S&W .357 Mag.
Chances are he knows how to use it.
 
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Don Gwinn:

I was impressed how (sic) these animals that we view as food share our quest for life and liberty as well as most of our feelings of joy, affection, frustration, sadness and pain. [/quote]

Uh, she's definitely never been around some REAL chickens. They are some of the dumbest animals I've ever seen! (except the author of this letter, of course!) She's most definitely a few "Fruit Loops short of a full bowl!" :D

Popeyes extra-spicy sure is sounding good right now... Think I'll fry up some breasts tomorrow in her honor!



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"Pray as if your life depends on God, Prepare as if it all depends on you..." -Texas Preacher

Liberty or death, what we so proudly hail... DON'T TREAD ON ME!!-Metallica

"Many's the men who've battled foe
many the number slain,
many the lads have fallen though
Scotland shall rise again."
 
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