First, I don't hate the .40 SW but I don't shoot it. In semi-autos, I like .45 acp or move down to 9 mm when I want a smaller gun or a hi-cap gun. While the .40 SW outperforms the 9mm, the gap in practical performance has shrunk with the development of modern hollow points.
The FBI was using 9 mm Silvertips in the Miami Shootout. There were a number of fatal wounds but only one bullet could be said to have failed to adequately penetrate to a vital organ. It stopped about a 1/4 inch short and, if memory serves correctly, it hit the bad guy at a side profile. This lead to the 12 inch penetration standard. I don't mean to say the 9 mm is better than the .40 SW.
Regarding decibels. One post states the .45 acp is the same loudness a that of the .40 SW and references page four of the article at
http://www.surefire.com/images/articles/pdf/Dangerous_Decibels.pdf. I have to question the accuracy of the article. In at least one respect, it is contrary to my own experience and probably that of most shooters. It states the .45 acp has a level of 165 dB while the .357 Magnum has a level of 160 dB. There is no way a .45 acp is louder than a .357 magnum. I don't shoot .40 SW so cannot comment authoritatively on the sound level
I rather quickly found another source which also disagrees that the .45 acp is louder than a .357 magnum. See
http://9x19mm.com/forum3/viewtopic.php?f=7&t=328&p=3909. Unfortunately, it did not list .40 SW.
The questionable accuracy of the sound chart, however, is not my main point.
Snappy recoil. If you look at typical .40 SW loads, their weights, and their muzzle velocities, they may or may not have slightly more momentum leaving the barrel than the typical .45 ACP (standard pressure) rounds using the formula of Momentum = Mass x Velocity (muzzle velocity).
However, the more relevant formula is that of Force.
Force = Mass x Acceleration
Acceleration, and thus Force takes Time into consideration. If a given mass accelerates more rapidly, there is a greater resulting force. Since the typical .40 SW bullet has a higher acceleration than the typical .45 ACP bullet, it will have a significantly higher Force.* You feel this higher force in the recoil of the firearm. Think of it as the same total Momentum but experienced in a shorter time frame. That's why the .40 SW feels snappier.
Unfortunately, I've been out of school long enough that demonstrating specific examples is a bit of a challenge. Perhaps an engineer or someone can back me up on this or show that I'm full of it.
*BTW, it will also have a significantly higher Kinetic Energy (1/2 Mass x Velocity x Velocity).