As near as I can tell, to be a Democrat...
You have to believe the AIDS virus is spread
by a lack of funding.
You have to believe that the same public
school teacher who can't teach 4th graders how to read is qualified to teach those same kids about sex.
You have to believe that guns in the hands of
law-abiding Americans are more of a threat
than nuclear weapons in the hands of the freedom hating Red Chinese.
You have to believe there was no art before
federal funding.
You have to believe that global temperatures
are less affected by cyclical, documented changes in the brilliance of the Sun, and more affected by yuppies driving SUVs.
You have to believe that gender roles are artificial but being gay is natural.
You have to be against capital punishment but
pro abortion on demand-in short, you support protecting the guilty and killing the innocent.
You have to believe that businesses create
oppression and governments create prosperity.
You have to believe that hunters don't care
about nature, but pasty, loony activists who've never been outside Seattle do.
You have to believe that self-esteem is more
important than actually doing something to
earn it.
You have to believe the military, not politicians, start wars.
You have to believe the NRA is bad, because
they stand up for certain parts of the Constitution, while the ACLU is good, because they stand up for certain parts of the Constitution.
You have to believe that taxes are too low,
but ATM fees are too high.
You have to believe that Harriet Tubman,
Cesar Chavez and Gloria Steinem are more important to American history than Thomas Jefferson, General Robert E. Lee or Thomas Edison.
You have to believe that standardized tests
are racist, but racial quotas and affirmative
action aren't.
You have to believe conservatives are racists, but that black people couldn't make it without your help.
You have to believe that the only reason
socialism hasn't worked anywhere it's been tried, is because the right people haven't been in charge...
Cowboy
You have to believe the AIDS virus is spread
by a lack of funding.
You have to believe that the same public
school teacher who can't teach 4th graders how to read is qualified to teach those same kids about sex.
You have to believe that guns in the hands of
law-abiding Americans are more of a threat
than nuclear weapons in the hands of the freedom hating Red Chinese.
You have to believe there was no art before
federal funding.
You have to believe that global temperatures
are less affected by cyclical, documented changes in the brilliance of the Sun, and more affected by yuppies driving SUVs.
You have to believe that gender roles are artificial but being gay is natural.
You have to be against capital punishment but
pro abortion on demand-in short, you support protecting the guilty and killing the innocent.
You have to believe that businesses create
oppression and governments create prosperity.
You have to believe that hunters don't care
about nature, but pasty, loony activists who've never been outside Seattle do.
You have to believe that self-esteem is more
important than actually doing something to
earn it.
You have to believe the military, not politicians, start wars.
You have to believe the NRA is bad, because
they stand up for certain parts of the Constitution, while the ACLU is good, because they stand up for certain parts of the Constitution.
You have to believe that taxes are too low,
but ATM fees are too high.
You have to believe that Harriet Tubman,
Cesar Chavez and Gloria Steinem are more important to American history than Thomas Jefferson, General Robert E. Lee or Thomas Edison.
You have to believe that standardized tests
are racist, but racial quotas and affirmative
action aren't.
You have to believe conservatives are racists, but that black people couldn't make it without your help.
You have to believe that the only reason
socialism hasn't worked anywhere it's been tried, is because the right people haven't been in charge...
Cowboy