Brenda - below are a couple of posts I did earlier that may help you. Felt recoil depends a lot on how you hold the gun and your shooting stance.
Thumb on top of safety - definitely. It helps to control recoil by putting the hand more in line with the bore. The off-hand thumb should be just below and pointing toward the target. Squeeze the palms together like a clam shell
with no gap remaining between the palms or thumbs. Check out this months "American Handgunner" gunzine. There are a several good pictures on pages 39,40,46 and 77.
I have seen lots of instances in competition where the thumb safety was knocked up during recoil by the competitor. It usually happens to new shooters who don't know how to grip 1911 pattern pistols correctly.
The most stable, and perhaps natural, for most people is a boxing stance with your strong side foot a few inches behind your weak side foot. Your feet should be about shoulder width apart. Knees slightly bent. Have your weight a little forward on the balls of your feet. Next, establish your natural point of aim using a modified
isosceles stance for the upper body. This is both arms out straight gripping the gun with a slight flex in the elbows. To determine your natural point of aim, start from the ready position, keep your head up, close your
eyes, and bring the gun up to the shooting position I described above. Open your eyes and look where the front sight is. Move only your rearward (strong side) foot back or forward a few inches pivoting on the other foot to line up the sight with your eyes. Don't move anything else. This is your natural point of aim. When you shoot, align your feet in this position.
Also, CCI Blazer is "hot" ammo. It's loaded to a higher velocity than most other commercial ammo. You can expect more recoil with this ammo. Try several others for a cheaper source of practice ammo like American Eagle, Winchester white box, etc. Use the premium hollowpoint ammo for defensive use. Be sure to shoot several boxes of a particular type to make sure it functions reliably in your gun.