motherwithagun,
I've shot .357's since 1961: Pythons, a Colt Trooper, Smith's, and a Taurus or two. My snubs are a Colt Magnum Carry and a Smith 649. Both weigh 23-25 ounces. They both have kick to them but are controllable.
My "always" gun is a Smith 340Sc which weighs 12 ounces. I use Crimson Trace over molded grips because of the laser and the rubber helps absorb the recoil. When I practice, I use shooting gloves and a band-aid on my trigger finger. If I don't, I bleed. (OK, I'm old and have old, brittle skin.)
I bought the 340 because of the weight. It carries very well in pocket, IWB, paddle, and ankle holsters. The recoil is very strong because it kicks like a mule. Somebody said "it was like shaking hands with the devil". I agree.
They are not cheap. Mine, bought NIB in Feb. `03, was a "gun show special" at $540.00, which was the cheapest price I'd ever seen.
If possible, try the gun you like before you buy it. Look for a used model or try to rent one at a local range. When you lighten the weight of a .357, recoil increases. That can't be avoided.
One of the good things about .357's is that you can practice with .38's. You can try various types of ammo to determine which ammo suits your needs.
I reload and have a round the matches POA/POI of the carry ammo, Federal 130gr Hydro Shok.
Light weight and inexpensive do not go together. Both Smith and Taurus make hammerless light weight guns. I've had two Taurus revolvers break on me so I stay away from that brand.
Good luck in your search and welcome to the forum.
John