5/25/00 1:35 p.m.
Patsy Get Your Gun: Rosie Needs It
The sophistries of Rosie O'Donnell.
By M. Christine Klein, freelance writer and attorney in Virginia
Rosie O'Donnell's bodyguard recently applied to the Greenwich Police Department for a concealed weapon permit. This has led to rumors, so far denied by the O'Donnell camp, that the guard will carry a gun when accompanying Ms. O'Donnell's son, Parker, to public school starting this fall.
Ms. O'Donnell, notorious for her virulent anti-gun stance, insists that although she doesn't personally own a gun, "if you are qualified, licensed and registered, I have no problem." Moreover, according to today's Stamford Advocate, Ms. O'Donnell has expressed concern that "publicity about her son's attendance at a local school — coupled with the information that the guard would be unarmed — could make him [Parker] vulnerable to harm [emphasis added]." This is about as close as it gets to a concession that an unarmed private citizen finds himself at greater risk of harm from the various felons and crazies that populate our world.
Why is this news? Isn't it sensible that a high-profile, very wealthy celebrity would take whatever measures necessary to protect her children? Sure, but consider: Just last year, while conceding that she was "not an expert on the Amendments," Ms. O'Donnell came to the startling conclusion that the "only people in this nation who should be allowed to own guns are police officers." (Wow! What would Amadou Diallo think?)
She elaborated: "I don't care if you want to hunt, I don't care if you think it's your right. I say 'Sorry.'" And to cap off this stunning display of jurisprudential obtuseness, Ms. O'Donnell added that, in what was then apparently her ideal world, "you are not allowed to own a gun, and if you do own a gun I think you should go to prison." Unless you're Rosie O'Donnell's personal bodyguard, apparently.
This is not the first time that Ms. O'Donnell has resorted to the actual or implied use of force. Last Halloween, the Queen of Nice had a security guard separate the parents of trick-or-treaters from their kids at the front entrance gate to her house in Nyack, N.Y. That's right, a security guard. So much for that Solidarity of the Moms stuff that's so recently been all the rage. (Come to think of it, given the Sturm und Drang about "kids killing kids," she might have been better off giving the adults the go-ahead and leaving the little shavers to cool their heels on the street.)
Ms. O'Donnell, in fact, recently left her 22-room Nyack spread, putting it on the market for $2.75 million. (Don't worry, the Queen of Nice won't be homeless: She bought a $6.75-million weekend home on Miami's super-exclusive Star Island last year, and also owns a home in Greenwich.) It seems trick-or-treaters are not her only security concerns. She's also had to endure the dreadful indignity of repeated doorbell-ringing by strangers, and a fan who scaled a brick wall to land in her yard. Then there was the threat to kidnap her son, Parker. And of course, the NRA kooks are mad at her.
While this is a woman who takes her security concerns seriously, she saves time for her political fomenting as well. The Queen of Nice was recently in the news as emcee of the Million Mom March (which, far from being a one-day mélodrame, has now officially morphed into a 501(c)(4) lobbying organization and a 501(c)(3) educational foundation.) The MMM branch of the gun-prohibition movement is, according to its website, willing to "acknowledge that guns may be necessary for hunting, law enforcement, and national security." Self-defense does not make the cut.
It's difficult, but when it comes to limiting gun ownership for people other than her bodyguard, try to understand how Ms. O'Donnell's mind works. Appearing on ABC's This Week on May 14, Ms. O'Donnell argued that "there are 200 million guns in America and 20,000 gun laws. So the guns are winning." Is the argument here (assuming there is an argument here) that with 200,000,0001 "gun laws," this anthropomorphized weaponry would be "losing" and we'd wipe out murder once and for all? If a country had one law prohibiting murder (say, oh, the Fifth Commandment), and two homicidally-inclined people, would that mean the cutthroats would, ipso facto, triumph? And what if there were three versions of the Fifth Commandment — would that then solve the problem? Rosie, violent human passion has been with us since Cain killed Abel, and no amount of gun control is ever going to change that.
And the spirit of Cain still haunts us. Rosie O'Donnell knows this. As her spokesperson, Lois Smith, explained: "You can cope with almost anything. But when it comes to your child, that takes priority."
Indeed. Who could disagree? Certainly not Memphis, Tennessee mom Patsy Tankersley. "When it comes to your child, you don't know what you'll do," Ms. Tankersley once said. But in her case, more was at stake than doorbell-ringers, or even threats. In 1994, Ms. Tankersley was stabbed in her own home by two male robbers. After she refused their demand to remove her pants, one of the men slashed the throat of Ms. Tankersley's six-year old daughter. Ms. Tankersley quickly agreed to retreat into her bedroom and come back naked. But the robbers were in a for a shock. Ms. Tankersley emerged in the company of a .22-caliber semi-automatic pistol, which she used to blast one robber in the chest and send the second fleeing. Her daughter needed eighteen stitches to repair the damage to her throat, but mom and daughter lived. Ms. Tankersley's actions were ruled to be self-defense. According to Ms. O'Donnell's sophistry (or at least, one strain of it), Ms. Tankersley, a gun-owner, should have been taken from her child and put in jail.
Would any of the sorts of things Ms. O'Donnell advocates have protected Ms. Tankersley? Licensing and registration, a "one a month" limit, safety locks — none of these could have protected Patsy Tankersley and her little girl from robbers wielding knives (so far not the subject of regulatory demands by anyone, not even celebrities safe in their high-security cocoons.) On the other hand, consider if Ms. Tankersley had had to struggle with a safety device in the few crucial, panicky seconds she was given to take life-or-death action while her child stood helpless at the hands of armed brutes. As Sammy "The Bull" Gravano once explained (and he would know): " If I'm a bad guy, I'm always gonna have a gun. Safety locks? You'll pull the trigger with a lock on, and I'll pull the trigger. We'll see who wins." (One has to wonder: Will Rosie O'Donnell's bodyguard have a safety lock on his gun?)
Ms. O'Donnell can afford a security guard to protect her from trick-or-treaters' moms and dads and escort her own kids to school each day. Ms. Tankersley cannot. Ms. O'Donnell can afford to trade in one multi-million dollar mansion for another, more secure one. Ms. Tankersley cannot. Ms. Tankersley had a gun. It's a good thing. There may have been a million moms on the Mall, but at the Tankersley residence, there was only one — and nary a bodyguard or celebrity in sight. Let Patsy Tankersley have the final word here: "I knew I had to protect my daughter."
Patsy Get Your Gun: Rosie Needs It
The sophistries of Rosie O'Donnell.
By M. Christine Klein, freelance writer and attorney in Virginia
Rosie O'Donnell's bodyguard recently applied to the Greenwich Police Department for a concealed weapon permit. This has led to rumors, so far denied by the O'Donnell camp, that the guard will carry a gun when accompanying Ms. O'Donnell's son, Parker, to public school starting this fall.
Ms. O'Donnell, notorious for her virulent anti-gun stance, insists that although she doesn't personally own a gun, "if you are qualified, licensed and registered, I have no problem." Moreover, according to today's Stamford Advocate, Ms. O'Donnell has expressed concern that "publicity about her son's attendance at a local school — coupled with the information that the guard would be unarmed — could make him [Parker] vulnerable to harm [emphasis added]." This is about as close as it gets to a concession that an unarmed private citizen finds himself at greater risk of harm from the various felons and crazies that populate our world.
Why is this news? Isn't it sensible that a high-profile, very wealthy celebrity would take whatever measures necessary to protect her children? Sure, but consider: Just last year, while conceding that she was "not an expert on the Amendments," Ms. O'Donnell came to the startling conclusion that the "only people in this nation who should be allowed to own guns are police officers." (Wow! What would Amadou Diallo think?)
She elaborated: "I don't care if you want to hunt, I don't care if you think it's your right. I say 'Sorry.'" And to cap off this stunning display of jurisprudential obtuseness, Ms. O'Donnell added that, in what was then apparently her ideal world, "you are not allowed to own a gun, and if you do own a gun I think you should go to prison." Unless you're Rosie O'Donnell's personal bodyguard, apparently.
This is not the first time that Ms. O'Donnell has resorted to the actual or implied use of force. Last Halloween, the Queen of Nice had a security guard separate the parents of trick-or-treaters from their kids at the front entrance gate to her house in Nyack, N.Y. That's right, a security guard. So much for that Solidarity of the Moms stuff that's so recently been all the rage. (Come to think of it, given the Sturm und Drang about "kids killing kids," she might have been better off giving the adults the go-ahead and leaving the little shavers to cool their heels on the street.)
Ms. O'Donnell, in fact, recently left her 22-room Nyack spread, putting it on the market for $2.75 million. (Don't worry, the Queen of Nice won't be homeless: She bought a $6.75-million weekend home on Miami's super-exclusive Star Island last year, and also owns a home in Greenwich.) It seems trick-or-treaters are not her only security concerns. She's also had to endure the dreadful indignity of repeated doorbell-ringing by strangers, and a fan who scaled a brick wall to land in her yard. Then there was the threat to kidnap her son, Parker. And of course, the NRA kooks are mad at her.
While this is a woman who takes her security concerns seriously, she saves time for her political fomenting as well. The Queen of Nice was recently in the news as emcee of the Million Mom March (which, far from being a one-day mélodrame, has now officially morphed into a 501(c)(4) lobbying organization and a 501(c)(3) educational foundation.) The MMM branch of the gun-prohibition movement is, according to its website, willing to "acknowledge that guns may be necessary for hunting, law enforcement, and national security." Self-defense does not make the cut.
It's difficult, but when it comes to limiting gun ownership for people other than her bodyguard, try to understand how Ms. O'Donnell's mind works. Appearing on ABC's This Week on May 14, Ms. O'Donnell argued that "there are 200 million guns in America and 20,000 gun laws. So the guns are winning." Is the argument here (assuming there is an argument here) that with 200,000,0001 "gun laws," this anthropomorphized weaponry would be "losing" and we'd wipe out murder once and for all? If a country had one law prohibiting murder (say, oh, the Fifth Commandment), and two homicidally-inclined people, would that mean the cutthroats would, ipso facto, triumph? And what if there were three versions of the Fifth Commandment — would that then solve the problem? Rosie, violent human passion has been with us since Cain killed Abel, and no amount of gun control is ever going to change that.
And the spirit of Cain still haunts us. Rosie O'Donnell knows this. As her spokesperson, Lois Smith, explained: "You can cope with almost anything. But when it comes to your child, that takes priority."
Indeed. Who could disagree? Certainly not Memphis, Tennessee mom Patsy Tankersley. "When it comes to your child, you don't know what you'll do," Ms. Tankersley once said. But in her case, more was at stake than doorbell-ringers, or even threats. In 1994, Ms. Tankersley was stabbed in her own home by two male robbers. After she refused their demand to remove her pants, one of the men slashed the throat of Ms. Tankersley's six-year old daughter. Ms. Tankersley quickly agreed to retreat into her bedroom and come back naked. But the robbers were in a for a shock. Ms. Tankersley emerged in the company of a .22-caliber semi-automatic pistol, which she used to blast one robber in the chest and send the second fleeing. Her daughter needed eighteen stitches to repair the damage to her throat, but mom and daughter lived. Ms. Tankersley's actions were ruled to be self-defense. According to Ms. O'Donnell's sophistry (or at least, one strain of it), Ms. Tankersley, a gun-owner, should have been taken from her child and put in jail.
Would any of the sorts of things Ms. O'Donnell advocates have protected Ms. Tankersley? Licensing and registration, a "one a month" limit, safety locks — none of these could have protected Patsy Tankersley and her little girl from robbers wielding knives (so far not the subject of regulatory demands by anyone, not even celebrities safe in their high-security cocoons.) On the other hand, consider if Ms. Tankersley had had to struggle with a safety device in the few crucial, panicky seconds she was given to take life-or-death action while her child stood helpless at the hands of armed brutes. As Sammy "The Bull" Gravano once explained (and he would know): " If I'm a bad guy, I'm always gonna have a gun. Safety locks? You'll pull the trigger with a lock on, and I'll pull the trigger. We'll see who wins." (One has to wonder: Will Rosie O'Donnell's bodyguard have a safety lock on his gun?)
Ms. O'Donnell can afford a security guard to protect her from trick-or-treaters' moms and dads and escort her own kids to school each day. Ms. Tankersley cannot. Ms. O'Donnell can afford to trade in one multi-million dollar mansion for another, more secure one. Ms. Tankersley cannot. Ms. Tankersley had a gun. It's a good thing. There may have been a million moms on the Mall, but at the Tankersley residence, there was only one — and nary a bodyguard or celebrity in sight. Let Patsy Tankersley have the final word here: "I knew I had to protect my daughter."
