Must-have rifle accessories

O

Oleg Volk

Staff Alumnus
1. Score card holder: notches on the stock are just so old-fashioned.
2. Coffee cup holder: need the jitters to make groups like they were produced by a full-auto weapon.
3. Windshield wipers: for using red-dot or optical sights in the rain or fog.
4.

(please anything else?)
 
Coffee cup holder to enhance the jitters would be totally redundant for me. 6X scope provides all the movement I need.;)

How about a built in range finder that reads triple the actual distance? That would be good for my ego.
 
Seems to me that many rifles come with a BS generator.. Amazingly it gets turned off when you get that rifle and operator on the range.. Those 1/2 inch groups open up to 2 inches and those off hand hits on soda cans at 200 yards disappear.
That ultra reliable semi-auto chokes up..

Strange, huh? :rolleyes:

Giz
 
Just one to add to Oleg's

Automatic signaling device that activates after the last round of the day is fired. It activates a signal for my wife to put down her book and bring me a cold beer. The second beer activates the BS device that shrinks those groups from 2" to 1/2" and improves my off hand shooting 200%. Comes in darned handy!
 
Er, no, Giz. The BS generator resides between the ears.

Now, there may be a family of inanimate objects which stimulate said generator. This would include guns, fishing gear, race cars, bar bells--and cans of beer.

:D, Art
 
The coffee cup holder goes out when the hot stuff splashes on your face after the first round is fired. A camelback is easier.

The most useful accessory is a helper who carries the rifle for you and cleans it when you're finished.
 
An automatic Credit Card Disablement Module imbedded in the stock, so as not to mess with enhancing the rifle with outrageously expensive accessories and add-on doodads.
 
A detachable LAW (light anti armor weapon... a rocket launcher) on my Rem 700... So that way when I miss that shot at 300m. I can just blow it up instead...not only did I hit the target but I blew a giant crater in the ground too...
 
An Anti-Gravity device so its featherweight.
Anti-Grav Wheelie bars so no recoil.
Self-Cleaning mode like my stove.

Oh Yeah, and a cloaking device keyed to my contact lenses so only I can see it!:D
 
Modern rifles should be equipped with a decocker. Since i love food, maybe a flat section on top of the barrel so after i shoot 30-40 shots i can set a skillet on top and scramble a couple eggs or cook a burger while waiting an hour for it to cool back down???. Maybe a CD player or mini TV built into the side of the stock. A ultra small laptop that retracts from stock would be nice to catch the latest post on TFL between shots!!!
 
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