Have a couple 1911’s and an XDS, 45 caliber. Can anyone recommended (actually fired) a commercial self-defense load in 185 grain that doesn’t kick like hell in a Springfield 3.5 XDS. In the 5”1911’s the commercial 185 + p JHP are very manageable, but the short barrel XDS is hard to put back on sight when using them. Being a carry pistol, kind of defeats the purpose of a self-defense firearm if I can’t reacquire a sight picture quickly. I know HP’s need velocity to expand properly, but velocity equals more recoil. Any suggestions? The reason I put post here is I (may be wrong) would think if anyone would know more about loads, velocity, ballistics and flavors of ammo, it would be the re-loaders.