Kobayashi Maru

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Moonglum

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http://www.krdo.com/news/man-carjacked-by-pair-after-offering-them-a-ride/36073176

There was a car jacking in Colorado Springs yesterday. I don't have any more details than what's in the article but by understanding is the car jackers approached the victim, talked him into giving them a ride and when they got where they were going pulled a gun and took the car.

I know that most of the people reading this are thinking the same thing I was thinking when I read it "I never would have let them in the car in the first place." but I suspect that the car jackers approached the guy with the intent of car jacking him and had he turned them down they just would have taken the car then and there.

So even though part of our training is (or should be) avoiding the encounter in the first place there may come a day when we simply can't.

So my question is this.

In a situation like this, where someone approaches you in a public place where they have every right to be and asks you a question (however inappropriate) they have every right to ask. How do you (for lack of better term) deescalate the situation with you becoming the aggressor yourself.
 
Moonglum said:
...I don't have any more details than what's in the article...
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Which pretty much means that we can't know enough about the even to discuss it seriously.

Moonglum said:
...In a situation like this, where someone approaches you in a public place where they have every right to be and asks you a question (however inappropriate) they have every right to ask. How do you (for lack of better term) deescalate the situation with you becoming the aggressor yourself.
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It depends. It depends on exactly what is happening and how it is happening. It depends on exactly what the circumstances are, where you are and what is going on around you. It depends on your assessment of the the people involved. It depends on the totality of the circumstances.

The point is that there is no formula. It's not a matter of "if this" then "that." One will always need to assess what's going on and exercise some judgment to decide what to do.
 
And to follow up (since I had to step away from the computer for dinner) --

The sorts of things we can discuss profitably would be the sorts of options available. Various things one could do to avoid a confrontation. The idea is to understand the choices available to you. You will still need to exercise your judgment to decide what would be appropriate.

Also, have a look at the thread, Tips for deescalating conflict? in this Forum.
 
Paying attention to what is going on around us can really pay off.
If the victim had noticed the two guys approaching he could have gotten into his car before they got to him.
Then he could have locked the door and talked to them from inside the car.
And just driven off if things looked suspicious.
It's human nature not to be rude to strangers, but sometimes it's necessary.
 
In a situation like this, where someone approaches you in a public place where they have every right to be and asks you a question (however inappropriate) they have every right to ask. How do you (for lack of better term) deescalate the situation with you becoming the aggressor yourself.
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Just follow the advice of Gen. James Mattis and have that plan in place just in case.

Deaf
 
The only "plan" for the unknown is to be alert. Keep your head on the proverbial swivel. Stand or sit up straight with an attitude of confidence. In most cases, criminals are basically cowards who look for easy prey.
 
And to follow up (since I had to step away from the computer for dinner) --

The sorts of things we can discuss profitably would be the sorts of options available. Various things one could do to avoid a confrontation. The idea is to understand the choices available to you. You will still need to exercise your judgment to decide what would be appropriate.

Also, have a look at the thread, Tips for deescalating conflict? in this Forum.
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Good points. I would also advice a good self defense class, one that incorporates such.

Remember, keep them at a distance, keep things between you when possible. Its better to be in your car moving than not.
ACT like you know what they are doing and are confidently prepared (aka they are going to regret it) is very helpful.
 
This situation is easily avoided. YOU DON'T GIVE STRANGERS A RIDE! I was taught this before I was allowed to touch a steering wheel.

Anyone, ANYONE who approaches me out of the blue is dealt with sternly. Things I do to avoid these kinds of people:

1. Ignore them.
2. Make like I'm busy, walking around my car - using my car to keep distance between the aggressor and self.
3. Talk nonsense and jibberish to distract them.
4. Have my hand in my pocket on my holstered gun.
5. Yell: "Back off before I (fill in the blank with a verb) you with a (fill in the blank with a noun)".

I have been approached more times than I can count in parking lots and at gas stations by people who aren't there to help me in anyway. I tend to act erratically and strangely, move around a lot and speak loudly. This has worked for me.

I'm not a fan of "de-escalation" when random strangers approach you out of nowhere for who-knows-what. I assume they want money, my wallet, my car, or whatever I have that they don't have. Act like a victim; become a victim. No thanks, I will continue to go into my weird "defense mode".

So, if you ever approach someone in a gas station that you don't know, and he starts talking jibberish and weirdly moving about his car - yell out "HEY SKANS, IT'S COOL!
 
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skans said:
Anyone, ANYONE who approaches me out of the blue is dealt with sternly. Things I do to avoid these kinds of people:

1. Ignore them.
2. Make like I'm busy, walking around my car - using my car to keep distance between the aggressor and self.
3. Talk nonsense and jibberish to distract them.
4. Have my hand in my pocket on my holstered gun.
5. Yell: "Back off before I (fill in the blank with a verb) you with a (fill in the blank with a noun)".
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Sounds like your terror of other people is keeping you from actually enjoying your life.
 
Sounds like your terror of other people is keeping you from actually enjoying your life.
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No, not life in general, but it does keep me from socializing at gas stations and Walmart parking lots. Hey, I've had some really sketchy people approach me in parking lots and gas stations. One time, I am sure the man was looking to do me and my date harm. Other times, maybe they were just strung out looking for drug/alcohol money, I don't know. What I do know is that they weren't looking for some friendly conversation, that's for sure. Here just a few I remember that happened within the last few years:

1. Strung-out looking man quickly approaches on bicycle while I'm pumping gas giving me some kind of story and asking for money;
2. A different strung-out looking man approaches me at different gas station while I'm pumping gas "My dad's in the car, he needs insulin - can you help me out....bla bla bla...."
3. Woman steps out of car at yet a different gas station, approaches me, distracts me and asks if I want her to strip for me - prostitution solicitation at best; distraction?
4. Gangster-looking guy gets out of car (lots of people in car) at Home Depot - about 9:00pm. As I'm walking to my car, he's standing at my driver side door - looks like he's about ready to break into my car. He's taking a wiz by the driverside door. I simply say "Oh, excuse me...." and walk to passenger side door; open door and discretely grab gun from glove box (I know, what was it doing in there????). Wait for him to finish - turned out not to be a problem.
5. Boy-friend / Girl-friend give me a story about being stranded at gas station wanting a ride, bla bla bla....

So, yes, I'm on hyper alert when in parking lots at night or at gas stations. Believe me, I'm not missing out on any meaningful interaction with these folks by treating them as objects that could potentially harm me.
 
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Several years ago I was driving to work in heavy rain, my commute took place mostly on back roads. Saw a younger guy hitchhiking and pulled over. The first thing I noticed after he got in was that he didn't use his seatbelt.

But he recognized the old Willie Nelson CD I had playing and we settled into a decent conversation. Then he asked what I did for a living. I told him, and then he told me that he was a "special agent" and began describing his secret missions.

I knew I had a problem, and at this point we'd hit a long stretch open road. So I eased the car up to sixty while he talked. Suddenly he said "check this out" and reached into his jacket. Just as I was ready to slam on the brakes and send him flying he produced a fake badge.

I dropped him off a couple of miles down the road and then spent the rest of my commute laughing and cursing myself for being so stupid. No more hitchhikers for me after that.
 
I have had some "characters" approach me while I was pumping gas on several occasions. Situational awareness is the key. Every near encounter I have had was blunted by me getting into my vehicle or by casually making the person aware that I was carrying...pulling up my jacket or shirt. They turn away immediately. In the scenario described, I believe there is more to the story then meets the eye.

Walk-up ATM's are the worst. If I see someone that makes me feel uncomfortable I always stick a revolver in the front of my belt before leaving the vehicle and let everyone know that I am armed. I'm not confrontational by any means, just firm and polite. Open carry is legal in NC.
 
If I do not want to talk to someone, I dont. Why do people feel as if they must satisfy some strangers inquiry. I walk away and dont say anything at all. If they make some sort of attempt to bar my path.. thats when I will tell them to leave me be.

Some guy the other day wanted me to come and look at something in the bed of his truck.. he said something like psssst, hey.. come check this out. I kept walking in silence.
 
I've picked up countless hitch-hikers and have also helped out strangers that said they were in distress. So far I guess I've just been lucky and maybe I should think harder about these things. I've been conned and flim-flammed before even by bums claiming to be working for a local church in need of help. Sociopaths are everywhere these days I guess.
 
Make eye contact and firmly say no. Give no indication that you feel guilty about doing so, intimidated by them, are willing to consider changing your mind, etc. Think of it as a telemarketer. You have any trouble hanging up on them? If they ask again say no again and nothing else. Give no excuses. Keep moving if you are moving.
If you are not moving and they don't stop after the second time get moving/driving away.

I'm not a fan of "de-escalation" when random strangers approach you out of nowhere for who-knows-what.
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...And it's fine if you shoot them in your front yard, just be sure to dag them back in the house before the police arrive. They won't notice the blood trail or at least they will ignore it because its your property and they know that.
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In my 60+ years I have never had anyone try to assault me. Ever. I am a over 6 foot, a confident guy and I do carry concealed. I am amazed on the people posting who have had such experienced.
 
Me too but you never know when or if . My years of riding the NYC subways may become helpful. Mumbling and twitching is one technique I've learned .
Once you become 60+ you are higher on the target list of the BGs.:eek:
 
I must just give off a bad vibe or something.

I never get approached by anyone---if I accidentally bump into someone's cart at the store, I'm always the one receiving the apology

I'm not big at all---or young at all---or act in an aggressive way at all----I do carry myself in a focused, businesslike manner at most all times though.
 
Being big helps quite a bit it seems. 6'4" and 250 lbs, and I can count on one hand the times I've been approached by anyone seedy or with nefarious intent. OTOH, I have smaller friends that it's happened to many times each in the same area.
 
In a Sanctuary city we previously lived in it was very common to be verbally aggressively engaged by (IMHO) unsavory characters. Many had clever approaches starting with the time / location / directions.
After too many of these I started engaging them in Arabic. Every one looked puzzled then went to the next person pumping gas.
(If you don't know an obscure language learn to say 1-10 spelled backwards)
 
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