rezmedic54
New member
Something I found and figured everyone could us a laugh.
CARDINAL SERMON FOR JOHN KERRY
On a Saturday afternoon, in Washington, D.C., Senator John Kerry's campaign
manager visited the Cardinal of the Catholic cathedral. He told the
Cardinal that John Kerry would be attending the next day's sermon, and he
asked if the Cardinal would kindly point out Kerry to the congregation and
say a few words that would include calling Kerry a saint.
The Cardinal replied, "No, I don't really like the man, and there are
issues
of conflict with the Catholic Church over certain of Kerry's views."
Kerry's manager then said, "Look, I'll write a check here and now for a
donation of $100,000 to your church if you'll just tell the congregation
you
see Kerry as a saint"
The Cardinal thought about it and said, "Well, the church can use the
money,
so I'll work your request into tomorrow's sermon."
As Kerry's manager promised, Senator Kerry appeared for the Sunday sermon
and seated himself prominently at the edge of the main aisle. And, during
the sermon, as promised, the Cardinal pointed out that Senator Kerry was
present.
Then the Cardinal went on to explain to the congregation, "While
Senator Kerry's presence is probably an honor to some, he is not my
favorite
person. Some of his views are contrary to those of the church, and he tends
to flip-flop on many other views. John Kerry is a petty, self absorbed
hypocrite and a nit-wit. John Kerry is a liar, a cheat, and a thief. John
Kerry is the worst example of a Catholic I've ever personally witnessed. He
turned on his buddies in Viet Nam. He wrote a book and portrayed himself in
the best light when he was a traitor to his fellow servicemen. He has lied
about his military record and had the gall to put himself in for a medal.
He married for money and is using it to lie to the American people. He also
has a reputation for shirking his senatorial obligations both here, in
Washington, and in Massachusetts. He simply isn't to be trusted."
The Cardinal completed his view of Kerry with, "But, when compared to
Senator Ted Kennedy, Senator Kerry is a saint."
Be Safe Out There Kurt
CARDINAL SERMON FOR JOHN KERRY
On a Saturday afternoon, in Washington, D.C., Senator John Kerry's campaign
manager visited the Cardinal of the Catholic cathedral. He told the
Cardinal that John Kerry would be attending the next day's sermon, and he
asked if the Cardinal would kindly point out Kerry to the congregation and
say a few words that would include calling Kerry a saint.
The Cardinal replied, "No, I don't really like the man, and there are
issues
of conflict with the Catholic Church over certain of Kerry's views."
Kerry's manager then said, "Look, I'll write a check here and now for a
donation of $100,000 to your church if you'll just tell the congregation
you
see Kerry as a saint"
The Cardinal thought about it and said, "Well, the church can use the
money,
so I'll work your request into tomorrow's sermon."
As Kerry's manager promised, Senator Kerry appeared for the Sunday sermon
and seated himself prominently at the edge of the main aisle. And, during
the sermon, as promised, the Cardinal pointed out that Senator Kerry was
present.
Then the Cardinal went on to explain to the congregation, "While
Senator Kerry's presence is probably an honor to some, he is not my
favorite
person. Some of his views are contrary to those of the church, and he tends
to flip-flop on many other views. John Kerry is a petty, self absorbed
hypocrite and a nit-wit. John Kerry is a liar, a cheat, and a thief. John
Kerry is the worst example of a Catholic I've ever personally witnessed. He
turned on his buddies in Viet Nam. He wrote a book and portrayed himself in
the best light when he was a traitor to his fellow servicemen. He has lied
about his military record and had the gall to put himself in for a medal.
He married for money and is using it to lie to the American people. He also
has a reputation for shirking his senatorial obligations both here, in
Washington, and in Massachusetts. He simply isn't to be trusted."
The Cardinal completed his view of Kerry with, "But, when compared to
Senator Ted Kennedy, Senator Kerry is a saint."
Be Safe Out There Kurt
Oh man, we need a "post your favorite political joke" thread going here. i love 'em!
