My first handgun purchase for home protection was the Ruger GP100 .357 double-action revolver. Too nervous about 9mm's at the time, so I opted for the revolver. It is a little heavy, but it fits very comfortably in my little hands. I have been practicing with .38 rds--not much recoil. Recently started practicing with the .357 Magnum loads, and it knocked me around at first. (Not enough a** behind me I was told). Just more practice. It has been a reliable, accurate & respectable weapon. I chose this for home protection to put an immediate stop to any threat on my life. Whatever you choose, make sure your wife goes with you to get it -- she needs to see if it's going to be comfortable for her. That should be a key factor in her decision.