Firearm safety and small children

S

Shotlock47

Inactive
Hey guys, just wanted to get some opinions. I have a 3 year old daughter and a 4 month old son. I'm very safe with my firearms. Keep them locked up when I'm not cc or very very high up and never chambered. I just bought a new fnx 9 and I'm sure I'm not the only guilty person, but my 3 year old has seen me clean/ accustoming myself with my new gun, and has shown alot of interest. Not sure as how to properly teach her respect for them. I don't want to shelter her from them, but she needs to know their dangerous. Any ideas would be greatly appreciated. Someone told me a couple weeks ago, "let her shoot it" that didn't sit well with me since she's 3..... Lol. Any advice would be greatly appreciated their my world and no accidents allowed. :) I was not raised around firearms either, so I had to teach myself to respect them.
 
That's what I've been doing. Trying to explain that they can hurt people very badly. Which I'm realizing is hit and miss with 3 year old brain lmao
 
My daughter was taught the rules early on and always told anytime she wants to see a gun all she has to do is ask. If she ever sees a gun to find an adult and never touch.

Basically took the mystery out of it.

And of course kept everything locked up securely. Not "hidden", not "out of reach" but locked up.
 
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Out of reach might work for now, but there will come a day when what was once out of reach, no longer is. And you never really know when that day will come. It's for this reason that I would encourage you to go ahead and adopt practices that will be safe forever. Always either locked up securely (even if that's just a small nightstand lockbox) or on your person. On your person is best, IMHO, because, in case of emergency such as sudden home invasion, you are always prepared.

As to how to address curiosity, while it may not be a perfect analogy, I'd suggest treating your firearm like a hot stove. When they are young, they should be taught to never touch. As they get older, they may start to use the stove some, but only under your direct supervision. Eventually, they will have proven themselves sufficiently responsible and capable to cook you a gourmet meal while you sit on the sofa and watch the game. :D
 
A grade school friend of mine was killed by another 11 year old friend who's dad was in the police.

While a group of mothers were in the living room talking the two kids were in the parents room messing around. They came across a "hidden" loaded .357. Jimmy pointed the gun at Billie and pulled the trigger. Billy walked down the hallway into the living room and in front of all those mothers fell over dead.

My guess is that the father never taught Jimmy gun safety.:mad:
 
I taught my daughter's at an early age the stop, don't touch, etc part of it but I also committed to them that if they ever wanted to see, look, touch, handle, ask questions etc all they had to do is ask. I was asked several times by both of them (don't delay or make excuses as to why you can't right now or they'll stop asking and satisfy their interest themselves) and we sat down and I showed them how to safely handle a firearm, gave them safety lessons and answered all their questions.

Iirc the first time I was asked it was by my 4 year old. They (individually) asked several times over the years and I never hesitated to sit with them. As of now the oldest doesn't want anything to do with them and the youngest has her own 357 S&W and 40 cal Sig and shoots with me regularly.

As for storage, all but one handgun was locked in a safe with the one being "hidden" well up out of their reach (and almost mine). My rifles were stored under the bed in gun cases unloaded.

I think the key here is the safety instruction/awareness and supervised open access to them that kept their curiosity satisfied without having to sneak a peek behind our backs.

Obviously how much training and access is dependent on the child and only you can make the decision of how much and when is it appropriate.
 
For some reason my father, a WW2 veteran, never had guns in the house, but two uncles and my grandfather, all of whom lived within a half mile, did. We were taught from a very early age that guns were not toys. We were taught NEVER to point a gun at a person or a pet animal, because guns kill. Perhaps more important, we were also taught that we would NEVER EVER touch any of the guns without an adult present, and with adult permission and supervision.

In those days, Dr. Spock still held sway over child raising, and we were spanked for transgressions a lot less severe than playing with real gun without permission ... so we heeded the directive. None of those guns was in a gun safe, I knew, and I think my brother and my cousins all knew, where they were kept ... and nobody ever took them out without permission.
 
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My opinion.... but there is no "hidden" or "out of reach". We may think so, but 6yr olds move chairs and climb stuff. Come by the week after Halloween or Easter, they find the hiding spots. I thought about it a long time. For me, a class b RSC with a keypad is what I did. I bought a small 12" ish cube one. It was a few hundred $$ new. Made in USA. It is 1/2" door and 1/4" everywhere else. If they manage to knock it on the ground, it will not break and open. They can throw it out the window, over and over, all day long, and not have it open.
I'm not worried about theft. Or fire, etc. Keep the guns from the wrong hands. I'm sharing this for those of you considering smaller storage options.
 
What about the Eddy Eagle program. They are used in some schools, but our sportsman club has it. Once a year we present it and we use the local community center on a Saturday afternoon, its about a 1-1/2 hr session with some great videos. We invite Cub Scout Packs, Wolf packs, 4-H groups and anyone else who wants to attend. When its all over we give each kid a certificate for a free Dairy Queen sundae in town. The Dairy Queen trick gets a fair amount of the kids back again, the following year, for a couple more times. So these kids get to see this program more than once. It fairly well attended.
 
I was about 9 or 10. My younger brother was 4 or 5. We were visiting my grandparents farm when I noticed an electric fence. I told my brother, "don't touch that fence". It was just seconds later that I heard him screaming. I turned around and he had his hand on the fence and couldn't let go. I pulled him away from the fence and shouted at him. Didn't I just tell you not to touch the fence. His reply, "But you didn't say WHY not to touch the fence.

Kids are that way, simply saying don't do something will often just make them more curious. One of the best methods I've used is to take them out with some fruit, tomatoes, or something similar. Use ear protection for them and shoot the items. Point out that if they were to pick up one of the guns and it discharged it would do the same to them or their siblings if the bullet hit them.
 
I know of a few "Incidents" where kids were shot. Some went through the "Educational" process, and were told never to touch with out someone there. Some kids cannot control curiosity. I would lock them up.
 
Gunplummer said:
I know of a few "Incidents" where kids were shot. Some went through the "Educational" process, and were told never to touch with out someone there. Some kids cannot control curiosity. I would lock them up.
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Today, I would lock them up, too.

Re-reading what I posted a couple of enties above, I realize that it comes across like advocacy for education being sufficient. It's not. In my day, perhaps, it was, but that was then and this is now. My reference to Dr. Spock and spanking was intended to convey something, but it probably doesn't. Dr. Benjamin Spock wrote what mothers around the time of WW2 (including my mother) pretty much regarded as the bible of child rearing. Discipline in those days included spanking, and not always (in our house, rarely) with the palm of the hand. My mother used one of my father's leather belts. Today, that form of discipline is probably universally considered "child abuse" and is prosecuted when encountered. The reality is, it was effective. We were never spanked to the point of physical injury, but it stung -- both on the posterior (the Gluteus Maximus), and the puerile pride. We generally went a LOOOOONG time between spankings, because that's not the sort of thing even a headstrong kid chooses to undergo on a regular basis.

But that was 65 years ago. Spank a kid today and the kid will fire up his or her cell phone and have the cops arresting Mommy AND Daddy for child abuse before the belt even cools off. We're not allowed by the nanny state to discipline our kids any more, so the only option left is to remove all sources of temptation (or as many as possible).
 
When my kids were little they got a nerf rocket gun. I set up a little target range for them, and used that to teach them the rules of gun safety. Later on we got a bb gun, and did the same teaching with that. My daughter was 6 and my son was 10 when I first let them shoot a .22 rifle and pistol. Start them early!!
 
From the OP:

my 3 year old has seen me clean/ accustoming myself with my new gun, and has shown alot of interest. Not sure as how to properly teach her respect for them.
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Kids learn a lot from watching you. You show an object great respect and great care, they will notice that.

I would avoid giving any object that a child has shown interest in the additional allure of being forbidden. Let the child know you'll show the item to them any time that she asks. (Before embarking on that, make sure your spouse agrees.) That way, there's no temptation to search out the gun on her own and "sneak a peek"--all the child need do is ask.

In short, I'd handle (and DID handle) early exposure of children to firearms the same way you'd handle their exposure to any object that posed significant danger if the child were to handle it unsupervised. How did any of us handle the issues of hot stoves, boiling water, sharp knives, household chemicals, etc. with regard to child safety?

First, you limit (as in, try to eliminate) unsupervised access. Then, you teach your kids about them, via watching you safely use them (for example, watching you use knives and the stove to cook); and then later by having the child help you: have them "chop vegetables" with you and them holding the knife; and later still with the child actually chopping the vegetables, under your direct supervision, just as you have taught her to do. With firearms, that would involve (at the right age) letting her "help" you clean the gun, and bringing her to the target range (with eye and ear protection).

Bottom line is that limiting access, by itself, is less dependable than both limiting access AND age-appropriate training. And that training is not "one and done" or as simple as having them recite a few rules: instead, you can demonstrate the rules and engage in active training EVERYTIME you handle firearms in the presence of your children.

One downside, in my experience: raising your kids to consider a firearm as just another household item (that is indeed hazardous if used improperly) means that they may come to see guns as rather ho-hum: "Want to go the range with me? You can shoot some balloons and pop them!"

"Nah. There's a new Pokémon I'm trying to catch. Maybe next time."
:confused:
 
I am a great grand-father and have raised four of my own.
Firearm safety is absolutely key but kids are curious and they can surprise you in being able to get to what they are curious about.

As soon as my kids started showing interest in guns I taught them the first thing to do when handling a gun was to clear it. I stared teaching my oldest daughter how to clear my hand guns at the age of five. I always carried in the house but sometimes I took the gun off and set it on the table next to me. I was an attentive father and always watched my kids. I let them know that if they wanted to handle the guns all they had to do was ask. Every time they asked I allowed it. They would carefully clear the gun and announce "cleared" and then they could handle it. The safety rules always applied - muzzle in a safe direction and never point at something unless you wanted to destroy it. As soon as they could hold the gun and work the action they were taken to the range to shoot.

The key, I believe, was that having to go through the process of clearing the gun took most of the curiosity out of the gun. There are always guns in my home and they are never locked up. This won't work if a parent is inattentive or can't always follow the rules but it does work to keep your kids safe if they should run into a gun while visiting or playing at the neighbors who are less attentive.

A little more than a year ago My second child (a son) went to a local gun show. He asked to see a gun at one of the vendors and it was handed to him with a green tag to show it was not loaded. The first thing he did was to clear it for himself. He looked at me smiling and said, "knives are always loaded and guns are always sharp." to misquote what he was taught about guns and knives. I found out that my training was solid and had more of an impact than I could have known at the time. My kids grew up believing that clearing a gun was just part of handling a gun. It became an automatic and integral part of the process. I am a proud parent of kids that enjoy the shooting sports and understand that instruction is better than a lock and key.

Most parents try to "kid proof" their homes. I opted to house break my kids.
 
I raised two daughters to adulthood. I kept guns locked up when not in use, and used one of the quick-access safes in the drawer of my bedside table at night. I also satisfied my kids' curiosity about guns, let them handle them unloaded and supervised, taught them safe gun handling, and offered to take them shooting when they wanted. Both are now comfortable and safe with guns; one shoots well, owns her own pistol, and we shoot together whenever she visits, and the other shoots adequately but doesn't have much interest in firearms and only shoots with me occasionally.

I never took the chance of leaving firearms unlocked, though, all the way through high school. I don't think either of my girls would have messed with them without permission, but the stakes are too high to risk any misjudgment.

In addition, our house was quite frequently host to other kids. My kids often had friends over. I volunteered in local schools pretty extensively, and there were kids who were either friends with my kids or knew and trusted me, or both, and used our house as a haven when things were rough at home. The only question I ever asked them was, "Do your folks know where you are?" After that, I just made sure they felt safe and cared-for, but I didn't have time to teach every one of them about firearm safety, and I wouldn't have left the guns unlocked even if I had. Teenagers are still not mature in their thinking and reasoning.

I had one girl who spent nearly as much time at our house as her own. She started calling herself my "third daughter" and my wife and I love her like our own. We are still close even though she is now married with two kids of her own. She knows about safe gun handling, but I didn't always have that much time with all of them.
 
My daughter was taught the rules early on and always told anytime she wants to see a gun all she has to do is ask. If she ever sees a gun to find an adult and never touch.

Basically took the mystery out of it.

And of course kept everything locked up securely. Not "hidden", not "out of reach" but locked up.
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This is what I did with my children. Never any problems. From about 4 years old on they were allowed to touch a firearm under my supervision. They only asked a few times when they were younger, usually if I got a new gun they wanted to hold it and look at it. I never caught them snooping around looking to try and find them, nor did they seem overly curious. At 10 and 12 now, they are both quite the little shooters. With their age, and level of experience/responsibility, I honestly would trust them with the "rifle behind the door" like the good 'ole days... except everything still stays locked up because of their friends coming over. And because I hope my safe will stop a half-hearted smash and grab thief.
 
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