A witty poster on another board wrote this, and I enjoyed it so much, I HAD to share it -- http://www.spectator.org/
"Enemy of the Year
It's perhaps the cleanest campaign in Clinton political history. No cash in brown bags was distributed. The People's Liberation Army sat this one out. The oligarchs of Indonesia kept their checkbooks closed. The Worthen Bank didn't have to issue a single loan. Dick Morris wasn't called in to strangulate anyone. And there was no "coffee, tea, or me" in the Lincoln Bedroom. And see what happens when you play honest -- you win by an even bigger margin than when you convert the Chinese Embassy into your campaign headquarters.
Last week Enemy Central asked its agents in the field to send in their votes for Enemy of the Year. While political crime rates soared at home and abroad, our conscientious investigators and enforcers pondered their choices in the privacy of their voting booths and criminal labs, and in a shocker bound to revive comparisons to "Dewey Defeats Truman" wound up giving more than 80 percent of their votes to some combination of Bill Clinton and Hillary Clinton.
Roughly one-third of those ballots listed Bill by himself, another third settled on the pair, and a final third had eyes only on Hillary. ("Who you eyeballin', boy?!") Diversity, it would seem, follows the Clintons wherever they go.
For further proof, listen to some of the things they were called on the write-in ballots we received. "A true Borgia president" (this by someone in a position to know: Don Julin of Flippin, Arkansas); "Hands down it's the President's husband," Mike Clavin said from New Hampshire; "Hilliary Rodem Milhouse Clinton," San Antonio's Michael McClain spelled out with great care; "Hillary 'The Bull' Rodham Gravano," Barry Sweeney of South Salem, NY, punched out, showing off his voting skills well before next fall's Senate main event; "King Slick," as dandy Ralph Diamond put it from Annapolis. "Hillary Vladimir Ilyich Clinton," said one wiseguy who got away, James Storrs of Waco, Texas. It's quite a compliment to the first lady when a male recognizes she's no ordinary Krupskaya.
Voters also expressed genuine appreciation for the Clintons' accomplishments, for instance in the field of education and language arts. "Another term and Clinton would have us all speaking Chinese," Dave Anderson of Granger, Indiana, marvels. A few of our right-wing conspirators didn't exactly get their story straight. From Paso Robles, California, David Mindenhall, in voting for Mrs. C., said "she poses the greatest danger to freedom in the World." But further south in Riverside, CA, Craig Emert said, "Bill Clinton poses the biggest threat to the stability of the planet." New York City's Mike B. sees in Hillary his own, private Jesse Ventura doll. "She is as phony as a pro-wrestler," he writes, before providing the one insight everyone from David Brock to Barbara Olson to Gail Sheehy has missed: "Don't trust anyone with brown eyebrows and blonde hair."
That's no consolation to Dan Dalton, who via bullhorn from South Elgin, Illinois, cries out: "Conservatives: It's time we admit it without shame. Yes, we ARE afraid of Hillary Rodham Clinton." San Francisco's Christopher Drew concurs: "At any moment, I expect to see giant Chairman Mao-like posters of Hillary hanging from the buildings surrounding Union Square." Will other public hangings follow?
That remains to be seen. It has come to our attention that, for all the People's Republic like acclamation the Clintons have enjoyed in our election, a number of ballots snuck through that did not pay them sufficient homage. Some voters saw themselves as unworthy of voting for the Clintons, and so settled on lesser figures said to be connected to them -- little people along the lines of James Carville, Geraldo, Begala, Janet Lanny Davis, Rosie O'Donnell and least, but not last, "that quintessence of the Northeastern liberal: the greasy, sniveling, effete, smug, decadent, celebrity-sucking, still red-diapered Sidney Blumenthal," as Tom Kearny of Scotts Valley, California, puts it.
On the brighter side of civility, for once we've been able to measure the benefits voter registration at departments of motor vehicles, pawn shops, and half-way houses confers on the balloting community. Voting for the first time, Clarence Swinney of Burlington, North Carolina, selects "R. Emmett -- the Terrible -- Tyrrell" as "Enemy of the Year to America," beating out Wes Pruden and "Mush Dimbaugh." Russell Leisenheimer, spilling over from Cuyahoga Falls, Ohio, opts for Kenneth Starr, "for turning the OIC into a tool of partisan jihad." We suspects he suspects Starr is currently driving around Washington in a blue van that the FBI would very much like to inspect.
Finally, there are those unfortunate but predictable voters who insisted on injecting partisanship and attack voting into this campaign. Most of these haters displayed very bad temper in selecting Sen. John McCain as their EOTY. "Those of us at the grassroots level of the GOP can't wait to show our appreciation" to him, John Bolin writes from Overland Park, Kansas, for the poster boy service McCain's has provided the Democratic Party. "A Gore/Bradley vs. McCain election campaign would be historic," Harry Scott mongers from illegally named Christiansburg, Virginia. "It would be a Democrat vs. Democrat race." Others fulminate against sundry "Troikas of Trotskyites," if we can borrow the term Marlton, New Jersey's Michael Torrance applies to the three-headed monster of leftism News Media, Academia, and Hollywood. Thus, a number of voters cross out Jennings-Rather-Brokaw, or the big three networks, or even the big three newspapers. But the longest partisan knives as saved for the United States Senate, particularly its Republican managers, for botching the expulsion of the impeached president. One voter, who shall go unnamed lest he be indicted on a hate crime, blamed it all on the GOP's female senators.
Needless to say, one ballot had to be disqualified, not that we didn't appreciate Mr. David Dorion's selection of Ronald Corey, "who resigned as president of the Montreal Canadiens this summer after 17 years at the helm, and left the team in shambles." At least his president resigned. The problem, of course, is with Mr. Dorion's citizenship. He lives in Oakville, Ontario, Canada, and we're afraid the Reform Party would never forgive us if we allowed ferr'ners to vote in our elections.
By the way, did we mention that Algore Gore received not a few votes? Here's someone who invented the lightbulb, yet remains in the dark. Incidentally, we've also had to disqualify all those votes for the Clintons. As we've announced on more than one occasion, executive privilege protects the co-presidents from indictment or near-indictment. So there's no way under the Constitution they revere to name them enemy of anything (unless it be hate, racism, sexism, ageism, lookism, anti-Clintonism, and each other). Which leaves us in a bind. In our hearts we know they're EOTY, as do they. Guilt knows no borders. But for the sake of legal appearances, we must settle on some other choice.
Once again our voters inspire us. From atop Prospect Heights, Illinois, Kim Du Toit thunders, "We have met the enemy and he is not us, but POTUS." Tempting, but we must move beyond our obsession. Joseph Velli, of appropriately named New Freedom, Pennsylvania, shows us the way. "Unless 'We the People' decide to take individual and personal responsibility for what is going on in our country, we will continue to be doomed," he writes. "We are our own worst enemy, you know." Yikes!"
------------------
The New World Order has a Third Reich odor.
"Enemy of the Year
It's perhaps the cleanest campaign in Clinton political history. No cash in brown bags was distributed. The People's Liberation Army sat this one out. The oligarchs of Indonesia kept their checkbooks closed. The Worthen Bank didn't have to issue a single loan. Dick Morris wasn't called in to strangulate anyone. And there was no "coffee, tea, or me" in the Lincoln Bedroom. And see what happens when you play honest -- you win by an even bigger margin than when you convert the Chinese Embassy into your campaign headquarters.
Last week Enemy Central asked its agents in the field to send in their votes for Enemy of the Year. While political crime rates soared at home and abroad, our conscientious investigators and enforcers pondered their choices in the privacy of their voting booths and criminal labs, and in a shocker bound to revive comparisons to "Dewey Defeats Truman" wound up giving more than 80 percent of their votes to some combination of Bill Clinton and Hillary Clinton.
Roughly one-third of those ballots listed Bill by himself, another third settled on the pair, and a final third had eyes only on Hillary. ("Who you eyeballin', boy?!") Diversity, it would seem, follows the Clintons wherever they go.
For further proof, listen to some of the things they were called on the write-in ballots we received. "A true Borgia president" (this by someone in a position to know: Don Julin of Flippin, Arkansas); "Hands down it's the President's husband," Mike Clavin said from New Hampshire; "Hilliary Rodem Milhouse Clinton," San Antonio's Michael McClain spelled out with great care; "Hillary 'The Bull' Rodham Gravano," Barry Sweeney of South Salem, NY, punched out, showing off his voting skills well before next fall's Senate main event; "King Slick," as dandy Ralph Diamond put it from Annapolis. "Hillary Vladimir Ilyich Clinton," said one wiseguy who got away, James Storrs of Waco, Texas. It's quite a compliment to the first lady when a male recognizes she's no ordinary Krupskaya.
Voters also expressed genuine appreciation for the Clintons' accomplishments, for instance in the field of education and language arts. "Another term and Clinton would have us all speaking Chinese," Dave Anderson of Granger, Indiana, marvels. A few of our right-wing conspirators didn't exactly get their story straight. From Paso Robles, California, David Mindenhall, in voting for Mrs. C., said "she poses the greatest danger to freedom in the World." But further south in Riverside, CA, Craig Emert said, "Bill Clinton poses the biggest threat to the stability of the planet." New York City's Mike B. sees in Hillary his own, private Jesse Ventura doll. "She is as phony as a pro-wrestler," he writes, before providing the one insight everyone from David Brock to Barbara Olson to Gail Sheehy has missed: "Don't trust anyone with brown eyebrows and blonde hair."
That's no consolation to Dan Dalton, who via bullhorn from South Elgin, Illinois, cries out: "Conservatives: It's time we admit it without shame. Yes, we ARE afraid of Hillary Rodham Clinton." San Francisco's Christopher Drew concurs: "At any moment, I expect to see giant Chairman Mao-like posters of Hillary hanging from the buildings surrounding Union Square." Will other public hangings follow?
That remains to be seen. It has come to our attention that, for all the People's Republic like acclamation the Clintons have enjoyed in our election, a number of ballots snuck through that did not pay them sufficient homage. Some voters saw themselves as unworthy of voting for the Clintons, and so settled on lesser figures said to be connected to them -- little people along the lines of James Carville, Geraldo, Begala, Janet Lanny Davis, Rosie O'Donnell and least, but not last, "that quintessence of the Northeastern liberal: the greasy, sniveling, effete, smug, decadent, celebrity-sucking, still red-diapered Sidney Blumenthal," as Tom Kearny of Scotts Valley, California, puts it.
On the brighter side of civility, for once we've been able to measure the benefits voter registration at departments of motor vehicles, pawn shops, and half-way houses confers on the balloting community. Voting for the first time, Clarence Swinney of Burlington, North Carolina, selects "R. Emmett -- the Terrible -- Tyrrell" as "Enemy of the Year to America," beating out Wes Pruden and "Mush Dimbaugh." Russell Leisenheimer, spilling over from Cuyahoga Falls, Ohio, opts for Kenneth Starr, "for turning the OIC into a tool of partisan jihad." We suspects he suspects Starr is currently driving around Washington in a blue van that the FBI would very much like to inspect.
Finally, there are those unfortunate but predictable voters who insisted on injecting partisanship and attack voting into this campaign. Most of these haters displayed very bad temper in selecting Sen. John McCain as their EOTY. "Those of us at the grassroots level of the GOP can't wait to show our appreciation" to him, John Bolin writes from Overland Park, Kansas, for the poster boy service McCain's has provided the Democratic Party. "A Gore/Bradley vs. McCain election campaign would be historic," Harry Scott mongers from illegally named Christiansburg, Virginia. "It would be a Democrat vs. Democrat race." Others fulminate against sundry "Troikas of Trotskyites," if we can borrow the term Marlton, New Jersey's Michael Torrance applies to the three-headed monster of leftism News Media, Academia, and Hollywood. Thus, a number of voters cross out Jennings-Rather-Brokaw, or the big three networks, or even the big three newspapers. But the longest partisan knives as saved for the United States Senate, particularly its Republican managers, for botching the expulsion of the impeached president. One voter, who shall go unnamed lest he be indicted on a hate crime, blamed it all on the GOP's female senators.
Needless to say, one ballot had to be disqualified, not that we didn't appreciate Mr. David Dorion's selection of Ronald Corey, "who resigned as president of the Montreal Canadiens this summer after 17 years at the helm, and left the team in shambles." At least his president resigned. The problem, of course, is with Mr. Dorion's citizenship. He lives in Oakville, Ontario, Canada, and we're afraid the Reform Party would never forgive us if we allowed ferr'ners to vote in our elections.
By the way, did we mention that Algore Gore received not a few votes? Here's someone who invented the lightbulb, yet remains in the dark. Incidentally, we've also had to disqualify all those votes for the Clintons. As we've announced on more than one occasion, executive privilege protects the co-presidents from indictment or near-indictment. So there's no way under the Constitution they revere to name them enemy of anything (unless it be hate, racism, sexism, ageism, lookism, anti-Clintonism, and each other). Which leaves us in a bind. In our hearts we know they're EOTY, as do they. Guilt knows no borders. But for the sake of legal appearances, we must settle on some other choice.
Once again our voters inspire us. From atop Prospect Heights, Illinois, Kim Du Toit thunders, "We have met the enemy and he is not us, but POTUS." Tempting, but we must move beyond our obsession. Joseph Velli, of appropriately named New Freedom, Pennsylvania, shows us the way. "Unless 'We the People' decide to take individual and personal responsibility for what is going on in our country, we will continue to be doomed," he writes. "We are our own worst enemy, you know." Yikes!"
------------------
The New World Order has a Third Reich odor.