A little light fiction.....
From the Houston Chronicle, by Michael Hedges
WASHINGTON - Bill Burkett …possible CBS source for disputed memos about President Bush's Guard service, has a long history of making charges against Bush and the Texas National Guard.
Burkett's allegations have changed over the years, and have been dismissed as baseless by former Guard colleagues, state legislators and others.
Even Burkett has admitted some of his allegations are false.
Burkett wrote a long indictment against Bush for a Web site in 2003 in which he said he personally was ordered to "alter personnel records of George W. Bush." In that article, Burkett said that when he refused he was sent to Panama as punishment, where he contracted a disabling disease.
But when asked about that charge by the Houston Chronicle in February, Burkett said, "That statement was not accurate, that is overstated."
In February, Burkett said he witnessed documents from Bush's records in a garbage can at a Guard base in Austin.
"My eyes fixed on the first page," he said in an interview in February. "It had Bush, George W. Lt1. What I did next still bothers me. I browsed through the top five or six pages."
Texas Guard officials said no Texas Air Guard records had ever been stored at the facility Burkett named.
Scene from the Texas Air Guard, sometime in the late 1990s…..
The unscrupulous but upwardly mobile high-ranking officer is seated at his desk in the Air Guard headquarters. His uniform is clean and perfectly pressed. He has emblems of rank on his epaulets, collars, and cufflinks. He has numerous decoration ribbons on his shirt. On the wall behind him is a picture of himself in dress uniform.
The telephone rings…
UUMHR Officer: Texas Air Guard, Commander Dastardly speaking… Hello Governor Bush. Yes, I remember you were an officer here once. “Clean out” your records, sir? Yes, I understand. Let’s see, that’s an offense under the Uniformed Code of Military Justice; I could be stripped of rank and removed from service, destroy my career and loose my pension. Not to mention being a rather dishonorable and naughty thing to do.
But, sir, since it’s you, and you might be elected President someday (by the way, is the Florida voting plan coming along?) and I’m unscrupulous and incompetent, but desire a promotion, I’ll do it. At once!
[He salutes the telephone and hangs up.]
The unscrupulous but upwardly mobile high-ranking officer sits in silence for a moment. Then he presses an intercom buzzer.
UUMHR Officer: Evil, not too bright but slavishly faithful henchman? Please step in my office, will you?
ENBSFH enters. He is large, fat and slovenly. He has a hump on one side of his back, a cast to the eye on the other side, wild hair, buck teeth and drools slightly. His clothes fit him like an unmade bed. He has sergeant’s stripes.
ENBSFH: Yes, master?
UUMHR Officer: Ah, very good, henchman. I want you to find Governor Bush’s records, and destroy anything that might show he was anything but a perfect officer and pilot.
ENBSFH: Of course, master. What should I destroy?
UUMHR Officer: Oh, the usual. The court-martial papers for flying while drunk, the court-martial records for atrocities committed on Texas ranchers, his pay records, excuses for being absent signed by his father, pretty much everything. He has to look like a perfect officer. This is a secretive and highly illegal action, so only take two or three others with you to do this. Sub-henchmen you can trust. No one must ever know what we are doing here. We could all loose our cushy jobs here if we’re not very careful and cunning.
ENBSFH: Yes, master. What do you want me to do with the papers? Shred them? Burn them? Eat them?
UUMHR Officer: No, just dump them in the trash behind the building. That will be fine.
ENBSFH: Yes, master. [ENBSFH leaves, dragging one leg behind him.]
UUMHR Officer smiles to himself and speaks aloud: I
will be Air Lord for this! Mother will be so proud!!!
