Phew ok...
I'm going to run up a quick guide, this is by no means all inclusive, but if you wish to go this route, this should be very helpful. Also look over Backpacker magazine, the Gear Guide should be available now.
Pack Packs are very important, with a good pack, you can go a much longer distance, carry more gear comfortably, and feel less sore at the end of the day. First, there are two types of packs, internal and external frame. Internal frame is by far the most popular these days for good reason. They're more comfortable, the internal rods can often be molded a bit to your back. Packs will range in size determined by capacity [in cubic inches] and size of your torso. Ensure that the sales associate measures your torso length, as the packs will range from XS to XL, and this helps in proper adjustment of shoulder straps and hip belt. Look for a pack with a good, sturdy, comfortable hip belt. This belt is very important as it places the weight in the pack on your legs, which have the largest muscles, and make it more comfortable to carry. Find a good material, most of the better packs are made of ripstop nylon. Look for good padding along the back, as well as ventilation to take away sweat.
Tent A good tent is lightweight, has enough space for you, your partner, and your packs, has good ventilation for those whom may deal with hot nights, and has a good rainfly that goes all the way to the ground. These days a lot of tent poles are being made with carbon fiber rods to reduce weight. Look for a tent that has quick together clips. Get a sealant for the seams. And above all, practice putting up the tent at home or in your yard.
Cooking A good packstove and cookware are important for the psychological value of warmth and hot food. Considering these are for Bugging Out, you may wish to look over Whisper, which makes multifuel stoves, designed to burn gas, diesel, white gas, propane, butane, etc. Look for stacking cookware, and if you can afford it, titanium is very lightweight.
Sleeping bag There are two types, down and man-made materials. Down is great because its lighter, synthetic is more water resistant. Bags are measured in the degrees they should be effective to. Shop accordingly, too heavy a bag and you'll be drenched in sweat on a warm spring or fall evening. Too light a bag and you'll be having to bundle up more for warmth. Also, invest in a pad for underneath the bag. It adds a layer of warmth, and does add a layer of comfort.
Knife Do yourself a favor and spend the money to get a good quality knife. It'll last longer, be more resistant to damage, and keep an edge longer. Get a good sharpening kit and learn how to use it.
Clothing Look for clothing that can be layered, is light, versatile, warm, and comfortable to wear. If you can find clothes that can be easily packed, thats a bonus.
Just a few basic thoughts, but as in a lot of life, what you pay is what you get with gear. The good stuff is often pricier but, if you're planning to survive off of it, may be worth your while. Ensure you try everything at least once at home, then take it out to a spot where you can pull up your car, and try it out at a spot. Take the equipment out a couple of times a year, the more you use it, the easier it'll be to use under a stressful condition. As a bonus, you'll have some fun
I recommend keeping one in each car - right behind the passenger seat. Or since you're married, one basic kit with extra water and warmers, and one augmented kit in each car. You can keep the spare in the trunk.