Bruce in West Oz
New member
You might have to repeat some of the words aloud in a slow drawl to see where the definitions come from 
Log On - Make the barbie hotter
Log Off - Don't add any more wood
Monitor - Keepin' an eye on the barbie
Download - Get the firewood off the ute
Floppy Disc - What you get liftin' too much firewood at once
Window - What you shut when it's cold
Screen - What you shut in the mozzie season
Byte - What mozzies do
Mega Byte - What Kimberley mozzies do
Chip - A beer snack
Micro Chip - What's left in the bag after you've eaten the chips
Modem - What you did to the lawns
Dot Matrix - Old Dan Matrix's wife
Laptop - Where the cat sleeps
Software - Plastic knives and forks you get at Big Rooster
Hardware - Real stainless steel knives and forks from K Mart
Mouse - What eats the grain in the shed
Mainframe - What holds the shed up
Web - What spiders make
Web Site - The dunny or under the veranda
Cursor - The old bugger that swears a lot
Search Engine - What you do when the ute won't go
Upgrade - A steep hill
Server - The person at the pub that brings out the counter lunch
Mail Server - The bloke at the pub that brings out the counter lunch
User - The neighbour who keeps borrowin' things
Network - When you have to repair your fishin' net
Internet - Complicated fish net repair method
Netscape - When fish swims out of reach of net
Online - When you get the washin' hung out
Off Line - When the pegs don't hold the washin' up
Programs - What ya get when ya go to the footy.
Hard drive - Perth to Ayers Rock via the Gunbarrel Highway.
C Drive - A road that follows the ocean.
Drive space - The gap between the car and the fence when ya back outta the garage.
Tools - Things ya chuck all over the shed when ya can't find the hammer.
View - What you get after the hard drive.
Paste - Stuff ya do at Kindy.
Internet connection wizard - Little city bloke who plugs in stuff.
WinZip - Painless circumcision.
Microsoft PowerPoint - The place where you plug yer computer in.
Font - The sound a Christmas puddin' makes as it hits the kitchen floor.
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Log On - Make the barbie hotter
Log Off - Don't add any more wood
Monitor - Keepin' an eye on the barbie
Download - Get the firewood off the ute
Floppy Disc - What you get liftin' too much firewood at once
Window - What you shut when it's cold
Screen - What you shut in the mozzie season
Byte - What mozzies do
Mega Byte - What Kimberley mozzies do
Chip - A beer snack
Micro Chip - What's left in the bag after you've eaten the chips
Modem - What you did to the lawns
Dot Matrix - Old Dan Matrix's wife
Laptop - Where the cat sleeps
Software - Plastic knives and forks you get at Big Rooster
Hardware - Real stainless steel knives and forks from K Mart
Mouse - What eats the grain in the shed
Mainframe - What holds the shed up
Web - What spiders make
Web Site - The dunny or under the veranda
Cursor - The old bugger that swears a lot
Search Engine - What you do when the ute won't go
Upgrade - A steep hill
Server - The person at the pub that brings out the counter lunch
Mail Server - The bloke at the pub that brings out the counter lunch
User - The neighbour who keeps borrowin' things
Network - When you have to repair your fishin' net
Internet - Complicated fish net repair method
Netscape - When fish swims out of reach of net
Online - When you get the washin' hung out
Off Line - When the pegs don't hold the washin' up
Programs - What ya get when ya go to the footy.
Hard drive - Perth to Ayers Rock via the Gunbarrel Highway.
C Drive - A road that follows the ocean.
Drive space - The gap between the car and the fence when ya back outta the garage.
Tools - Things ya chuck all over the shed when ya can't find the hammer.
View - What you get after the hard drive.
Paste - Stuff ya do at Kindy.
Internet connection wizard - Little city bloke who plugs in stuff.
WinZip - Painless circumcision.
Microsoft PowerPoint - The place where you plug yer computer in.
Font - The sound a Christmas puddin' makes as it hits the kitchen floor.
B