Assault Bar-B-Q Sauce?!?!

4

45King

New member
An item reported in today's local paper:

One Morris Burston was in a local Piggly Wiggly supermarket Tuesday afternoon when he was spotted by employees stealing some steak kinves. Manager Paul Blevins and employee Wayne Blackburn confronted Burston as he was attempting to leave the store. Blevins asked Burston to accompany them to the store office, where Burston then produced a case of Kool Aid when asked if he had stolen anything else. Sheriff's dept. deputies were already on the way, and it was at this point that Burston produced a .22 pistol and threatened to shoot Blevins and Blackburn if they didn't give him room. They tried to back up, but Burston kept advancing. He then fired two shots which struck no one. At this point, Blevins tackled Burston and wrestled the gun away from him. Blackburn grabbed the first thing handy, a bottle of barbeque sauce, and smacked Burston on the back of the head with it to help subdue him. It did the trick. A spokesman for the Richland County Sheriff's Dept. said that Burston's injuries did not appear serious, but they were "covered with barbeque sauce." He also said that since the bottle broke, the deputies could not collect it as evidence.(Duh.)

Burston was given a quick trip to the local hoosegow after a stop for a few stitches.

Blevins casually commented to reporters, <BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Basically, it was just a shoplifter who got a little out of hand. He took a couple of shots at us.[/quote]

Neither Blevins nor Blackburn knew what brand of barbeque sauce was used.

My comments:

(1)Was Blevins' course of action a measured courageous risk, or a foolhardy but lucky one? I think the former.

(2)I wonder how one rates the "stopping power" of barbeque sauce? Which condiment do YOU suppose has the most stopping power? (My money is on tobasco sauce.<G> )

(3)Knowing how Al Gore feels about charcoal grilling, will he call for bans or restrictions on "assault barbeque sauce?"




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Shoot straight & make big holes, regards, Richard at The Shottist's Center
 
He's lucky they didn't have a bottle of mustard handy. I heard the Germans used it quite a bit in WWI. Terrible stuff, as I've heard.
 
A bit of thread drift...
I know a guy who is a cook at the CYA (Calif Youth Authority) Boy's facility (for minor aged felon's) near here.
As many of the inmates are Hispanic, Mexican style food is common. Hot and spicy salsa is included. The salsa is carefully monitored and the boys are searched after meals to preclude them smuggling it out. I asked why and he told me that they have used it in assaults on other inmates.

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"Quis custodiet ipsos custodes" RKBA!
 
Ever gotten Dave's Insanity Sauce in your eye? Believe me, you DON'T want that. I'd rather be Maced.

BOT, Blevins got it right. He used the closest available weapon to subdue a murderer: you don't shoot at someone unless you plan to kill them, Burston fired two shots at Blevins and Blackburn, therefore he attempted to murder them... over steak knives and Kool-Aid.

Fry the bastard, sez me.
 
Saute, with a nice wine sauce.

Or fava beans and a nice chianti (Is that the correct line?)

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Rob
From the Committee to Use Proffesional Politicians as Lab Animals
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She doesn't have bad dreams because she's made of plastic...
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bad Kiki! No karaoke in the house!
 
That very question was on "Who Wants to be a Millionaire" last night, and the answer was indeed "chianti"!
 
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