Well, I just got back from my father's funeral. Not the best time of my life, but it certainly went worse than I thought. One of the few things my father and I ever bonded over was guns. Hunting and being outdoors together were always special times, but when my father called me several years ago wanting me to give him my opinion on a new gun he had heard about (Taurus Judge), then wanted me to help him find one, it made me so glad that my father actually thought of me as a valid resource in evaluating a gun for his purchase. We may not have shared a lot of special times together, but there were a few. After the funeral, I then come to find out that my step-sister has talked her mother into selling off my father's entire firearm collection. I know my father wanted me to have at least some of the guns that I grew up with, but he allowed my sister to create a new will for them, and she talked him into some things while he was too ill to say no. I'm not writing this to find a way around what happened. What's done is done. I just want to make sure everyone is aware that if you have specific desires about what you want done with your guns after you are gone, please make sure you not only have it written down, but that you also talk to everyone involved to make sure everyone is aware of your wishes.
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Advice for the future
- Thread starter Drizzt
- Start date
40caljustice
New member
+1. Buy the guns that mean the most. This is also an opportunity for you to set your kids up. Make sure each one or the only one knows what you want.
Sorry for your loss. It really sucks losing someone close.
Sorry for your loss. It really sucks losing someone close.
chadstrickland
New member
Damn straight man. Those are things that cannot be replaced. If it was me I would do everything in my power to hold on to them. I also know sometimes you have options and sometimes you don't. If you have the option..take it bud
Some things are worth it bud. Sorry to hear about your father
Some things are worth it bud. Sorry to hear about your father
This is a good topic - some excellent advice given here.
Yes, buy the guns you want - heck, buy all of them if you can - you won't regret it.
It's hard enough when a parent dies and they've only been married once and all the children have the same mom and dad. But, when you are dealing with stepchildren and stepparents, this kind of stuff happens quite often. Some things to remember:
1. Write down your intentions. Make sure it is in a format (Will, Trust, etc.) that will actually be useable after your death. If you leave certain guns and personal property to specific people - make sure they have a copy of your written instructions. Funny thing, Wills and lists that go along with Wills have a way of "getting lost" right after a person's death if there's a "bad apple" hanging around.
2. Keep records of your collection, keep it organized and make sure trusted people who will end up getting some or all of it have a copy.
3. Don't plan on "giving your guns away" as you get old and death is knocking on your door. Things rarely go as planned. Also, people who are old and feeble sometimes have a tendency to give stuff away to whoever is paying attention to them - gun collections, coin collections, etc. tend to "disappear" - sounds pretty bad, but it happens.
4. Know your kids and your husband/wife. Believe me, they are not all good or trustworthy - sad, but true. And, if you have one (or more) rotten apples in your basket, you can expect them to act even more ruthless and greedy once you die. Consider using a professional trustee if you have a troubled family situation.
Anyone who has kids from more than one marriage, or has many kids from one marriage, or just has a "bad apple" really needs to spend some time and get professional help thinking this stuff through. I tell myself: "I've got one kid - she's getting it all"......unless my wife dies first and some sweet little 40 something convinces me to marry her and give her everything when I'm 87. Yep, it can happen to me too.
Yes, buy the guns you want - heck, buy all of them if you can - you won't regret it.
It's hard enough when a parent dies and they've only been married once and all the children have the same mom and dad. But, when you are dealing with stepchildren and stepparents, this kind of stuff happens quite often. Some things to remember:
1. Write down your intentions. Make sure it is in a format (Will, Trust, etc.) that will actually be useable after your death. If you leave certain guns and personal property to specific people - make sure they have a copy of your written instructions. Funny thing, Wills and lists that go along with Wills have a way of "getting lost" right after a person's death if there's a "bad apple" hanging around.
2. Keep records of your collection, keep it organized and make sure trusted people who will end up getting some or all of it have a copy.
3. Don't plan on "giving your guns away" as you get old and death is knocking on your door. Things rarely go as planned. Also, people who are old and feeble sometimes have a tendency to give stuff away to whoever is paying attention to them - gun collections, coin collections, etc. tend to "disappear" - sounds pretty bad, but it happens.
4. Know your kids and your husband/wife. Believe me, they are not all good or trustworthy - sad, but true. And, if you have one (or more) rotten apples in your basket, you can expect them to act even more ruthless and greedy once you die. Consider using a professional trustee if you have a troubled family situation.
Anyone who has kids from more than one marriage, or has many kids from one marriage, or just has a "bad apple" really needs to spend some time and get professional help thinking this stuff through. I tell myself: "I've got one kid - she's getting it all"......unless my wife dies first and some sweet little 40 something convinces me to marry her and give her everything when I'm 87. Yep, it can happen to me too.
Let me first say how sorry I am for your loss. Buying the gun(s) that mean most to you is certainly an option but I would first talk to the mother and explain your side. I would think that a parent would allow you to take the items (not just guns) that you wanted understanding that he was your father.
Mike Irwin
Staff
Damn. Sorry to hear that Drizzt.
When my Dad passed 4 years ago it was very clear that I was to get his guns.
When my Dad passed 4 years ago it was very clear that I was to get his guns.
both of my sons have their own safe (cheap walmart safes) which they can take when they graduate college/trade school. They will get an envelope with a key to it in the reading of my will. Their collections consist of mostly .22s and shotguns right now. I set that up before I went to Iraq the last time.
I have 2 nice fireproof safes for my collection which is worth alot more. By the time I get closer to the age that I realize the time is near, I intend to already have given each of them one of the nice safes, probably timed as a wedding present or gift with the birth of my first grandchild from each of them. If they decide to not have kids or be gay they will have to settle for the cheap walmart safes.
I agree with the OP, planning ahead is important. I have loaned a couple guns to my dad and I'm concerned his ex wife will give them away to her son if he passes unexpectantly.
I have 2 nice fireproof safes for my collection which is worth alot more. By the time I get closer to the age that I realize the time is near, I intend to already have given each of them one of the nice safes, probably timed as a wedding present or gift with the birth of my first grandchild from each of them. If they decide to not have kids or be gay they will have to settle for the cheap walmart safes.
I agree with the OP, planning ahead is important. I have loaned a couple guns to my dad and I'm concerned his ex wife will give them away to her son if he passes unexpectantly.